Page 118 of The Billionaire's Bride
"Baron managed to free himself. He got to me and freed me. We’d been best friends since the first grade. Before we could remove the restrains of the other boys, they got to us. They separated us, took us into a different room," Edward murmurs. "And then,” he swallows, "then one of the men raped me."
"Oh, Ed," I swallow, "I am so sorry." My heart feels like it's going to shatter; tears prick the backs of my eyes. I swallow them back and my throat burns.
"The worst thing was, as he buggered me, I was actually aroused. I was twelve-years-old. I didn’t understand the difference between physiological reactions and desires, and they used my naiveté to shame me." Edward pauses to gather his thoughts, or maybe, his courage. "But it gets worse... They forced me to use the erection on Baron."
"What?" I cry in horror. "How could they? Oh, my god!" I glance from Ed to Baron, who stares into the distance.
"I refused, of course." Edward murmurs, "so they began beating him up. I could see them hit him, hear his groans." Ed swallows. "It was…" He shakes his head, "When I finally couldn’t take it any longer, I agreed."
"You…a…agreed?" I blink.
"It was either that or stand by and watch him being beaten to death." Ed sets his jaw." When I agreed, one of the men raped me again. He forced an erection on me, and this time, I had to use it on Baron."
"Which, in turn, elicited an erection from me, and when they asked me to use it on Ed, I—" Baron's throat moves as he swallows, "I knew if I didn’t, they'd only beat him up, or beat me again and... I couldn't bear the thought of it...so I did it."
Edward jumps in, “They made it seem like they were giving us a choice, which only added to the guilt each of us felt—and still do—but the truth is, we didn’t have any other option. They used our shame to manipulate us. The thing is, if you want to cause serious psychological harm to a child, use shame. It’s the most powerful emotion, and the hardest one to erase.”
“We didn’t know how to handle it, so we buried it,” Baron adds. “As you may have noticed, that didn’t work out so well.” He grimaces and shares another look with Edward.
"There were so many times, when I was sure that I was going to break, that I couldn't bear it anymore. It was the courage in Edward's gaze that kept me going. Baron's voice cracks, and I grip his palm between both of mine.
"Oh, my god." Tears flow down my face and I wipe them away. "I am so sorry for what they did to you guys. You were so young, just coming to terms with your own sexuality. It would have hurt you, and scarred you for life."
"And it did." Edward lowers his chin. "So, there it is, our sordid little secret."
"Now you know." Baron tries to pull his hand away from me, but I hold on.
"And you haven’t told anyone else about this?"
Both men shake their head.
"So why tell me?"
"Because," Baron turns me, "I want you to know. We," he jerks his chin toward Ed, "we want you to know about what happened between the two of us. You need to know everything about me, so we can make a fresh start."
"A fresh start." I tip up my chin, "Is that what it is?"
"It’s," he peers into my face, "whatever you want it to be, Eve."
I swallow down the sobs that threaten, "Okay." I half smile, "It’s going to be okay." I reach up, brush the hair off of his forehead, "Thank you for telling me."
He nods.
I turn to Edward, "Thank you for sharing this with me. Thank you for trusting me."
"I came today because," he links his fingers together and leans forward, "because I wanted you two to know that you have my blessing…" He chuckles. “Not that a blessing from an ex-priest means a whole lot.” He lifts a shoulder, "And it’s not that you two need it, but for what it’s worth, I don’t hold a grudge against either of you."
Baron wraps his arm around me and pulls me close. I recognize his gesture for what it is. Possessiveness, a mark of ownership, establishing his claim in front of his friend… And I can’t blame him. After everything we’ve been through, this feels right. And organic and natural, and so real.
"Thanks, man," Baron murmurs, "it…means a lot to hear that from you."
"You better treat her right," he says quietly, "else you’ll have to answer to me."
"Edward," I swallow, "I… I’m so sorry."
"Don’t be." His lips twist. "You gave me a new lease on life and I’ll always be grateful for that." He rises to his feet, "And now, I need to get going."
He has almost made it to the elevator when Baron calls out to him, "You’re coming to the wedding, right?"
