Page 66 of This and Every Life
“If you had one, there’d be a bee in there. You’re on the warpath, Ez.”
I shrug, putting the remnants of our meal in the fridge. “Yeah, well. Maybe I’ve realized there are some things worth fighting for.”
He doesn’t argue against that, but I can feel his gaze following me.
“Have you told Madison?” I ask. “Camilla?”
“Yeah. Madison wasn’t shocked, exactly, but I can tell she has questions. Camilla is…angry.”
I try to keep my thoughts aboutthatto myself, but Grayson must see something on my face because he goes on.
“My ex will be fine once she’s had time to think about it. Right now, she’s reacting on instinct. She’s hurt, and it’s easier to assume I might have been unfaithful all these years than to accept the fact that we simply were never going to last.”
“You shouldn’t have started,” I say under my breath, regretting the words immediately.
He doesn’t disagree. “No, but it brought me Madison. And I’ll never regret that.”
I let out a sigh. “Me, neither.”
Grayson is quiet for a moment. “She never hated you, you know. Camilla. She likes you, and I think that makes it harder.”
“Because I stole so much of your time.”
“Yeah.”
I nod, putting Grayson’s plate in the dishwasher before washing my hands. Leaning against the counter, I watch my friend. “People will assume you’re bi. Or, hell, even gay. That you were closeted.”
Grayson doesn’t flinch. “We already talked about this.”
“And we’re going to talk about it more. I want to make sure you’ve considered every angle.”
His lips curve into a bemused smile. “Really, Ez? You think I’m going to change my mind now, after I’ve already moved all my shit in?”
I roll my eyes, but he’s not done.
“You’ve been full speed ahead since the moment you suggested this. What changed? Why are you doubting now?”
“I’m not doubting,” I tell him truthfully. “It’s just… This will impact you, Gray. Heavily. You didn’t spend your life considering the implications of coming out as I have. And no matter the truth, peoplewillassume. You’ll be labeled and treated differently. And it won’t always be kind.”
Grayson lets out a slow breath, his large shoulders shifting as he sets his elbows on the countertop. Whereas I’ve always had to work to maintain my muscle, Grayson doesn’t have to try. He’s not heavily bulked. He’s just…big. Combined with the dark auburn hair and freckles across his nose, he makes an impression.
“Ez, I’ve always been different. People just didn’t know it. Let them think what they want.”
“Like I said, they’ll think you’re queer.”
“I’m nothing.”
I make a displeased sound at that.
Grayson only chuckles. “Stop. You know what I mean.”
I puff out a breath. “What will you say? If they ask?”
“The truth. That I’ve never had a preference for any specific gender.”
“Then they’ll probably go with pansexual.”
He shrugs. “I suppose that’s as accurate as it gets. My lack of preference is certainly equal opportunity.”
