Page 57 of A Thistle Beyond Time
Jenna frowned, considering the question. “I haven’t had much to be happy about this past year. Don’t get me wrong, the work I’m doing is very rewarding. It makes me feel good to know we’re helping so many people. My own happiness is the last thing I think about.”
Cormac brushed his hand across hers. “Ye deserve to be happy, lass.”
Jenna rolled her eyes. “Happiness is overrated,” she lied.
Cormac raised an eyebrow at her. “What do ye mean by that?”
“I don’t know if I can explain it. It’s hard to be happy. I guess I have moments of happiness, but it can’t last forever.” She reached her hand out to Cormac and he took it. “You know, you’ve made me very happy this past week.”
“Aye, you’ve done the same for me.”
“What makes you happy, Cormac?”
Cormac grinned. “Lots of things make me happy. A smile on your face makes me happy.”
“Not here in San Francisco with me. What makes you happy when you’re at home?”
The grin grew even wider, and his eyes sparkled with joy. “Ah… so many things. My family, my home, the people of my clan. Riding my horse through the MacKenzie lands and feeling the cool breeze on my face. The green grass, the forests, the ocean – the feeling that I belong there. There is much more, but I dinnae wish to bore ye.”
“You’re not boring me, Cormac. I love listening to you talk. Your home sounds like a wonderful place, I wish I could go with you. And before you say I could,” she paused, thinking of how she could possibly explain it to him. “I know I can, but I also know I can’t. This is all so new to me –you’reso new to me. I’m afraid of making another terrible mistake. Afraid my heart will be broken. I wish I was the kind of person who didn’t care about this kind of stuff. I wish I was the type of person who could just leave everything behind and go, but I’m not. I tried it once, with Jonathan, and I’ve regretted it every day since. You understand, don’t you?”
“Aye.” Cormac remained silent for a moment, his eyes travelling across her hair, over her face. “I don’t want to forget ye, love. I want to always be able to think of ye and remember exactly how beautiful ye are. I want to remember the touch of yer hands, the smile on yer face, the sound of yer voice in me ears, the taste of ye on my lips.”
Jenna found herself speechless. It was truly the most beautiful thing anyone had ever said to her and it brought tears to her eyes. Cormac noticed and brushed them away with his thumb. He ever so gently brought his mouth down on hers. Jenna met his kiss with all the sadness, hunger and longing she was feeling. Her senses drank him in. She couldn’t tell where she ended and he began. He felt so right, but somehow she knew it had to be wrong. Jenna would let herself forget all about that for now. She wanted to be with him, to go with him. How could she not? She cleared her mind of all doubt and gave herself up to this man, to this moment.
In the darkness of the room, Cormac lay awake, Jenna secure in his arms.Edna, are ye there? I must speak with ye.
Aye, Cormac, I’m here. Are ye ready to leave tomorrow?The sound of Edna’s voice in his head was reassuring. Cormac was still anxious that he might not be able to return home tomorrow, despite a part of him not wanting to go.
I am. Jenna willnae be returning with me. Of that, I am certain.
I’m so sorry, Cormac. You couldn’t convince her? What reasons does she give?
She doesnae trust me enough. She has been hurt too recently by her idjit husband and cannae believe I won’t do the same.
Do you love her? Because if you do, there is always hope. It is always possible she will change her mind. You do not know what tomorrow will bring. Be at the appointed spot at first light and wait for the fog. You will be home before you know it.
Thank ye, Edna. I do love her and I believe she feels the same for me, but it may be asking too much of her, to expect her to leave her life here.
Go to sleep now, my dear. The morning will be upon you before you know it. Things will work out exactly as they were meant to. I promise.
And then Edna was gone. Cormac lay on his back, staring up at the ceiling. How could things work out the way they were meant to? Jenna was not going to leave with him. She didnae even believe him. She most likely thought he was out of his mind. Amazingly, she still wanted to be with him, just not together at his home in Scotland. Taking a deep breath, Cormac tried to relax his mind and sleep. Tomorrow he would have to say goodbye to Jenna. It would be the hardest thing he’d ever had to do in his life, but he had nae other options.
* * *
The morning light peeked through the curtains and Jenna stretched her arms overhead. She turned to look at the man lying next to her and was surprised to find him wide-awake and gazing at her with the saddest expression in his eyes.
“I must go, Jenna,” he said. “I must be at the place where we met verra soon.”
“Oh, no. I don’t want you to leave,” Jenna cried.
“I have no choice. If I dinnae leave today, I willnae be able to go back.”
Jenna was absolutely baffled by his insistence that a witch had sent him to San Francisco and a witch was going to return him to his home. It went without saying that the fact he believed his home was in sixteenth century Scotland was simply beyond being rational. Despite her disbelief, Jenna decided she’d humor him and when he found he was still here later this morning, she’d do her best to help him overcome this delusion.
“I understand. I’d like to come with you.” On seeing the brilliant smile that broke out on his face, Jenna corrected him gently. “Not back to Scotland, just down to the Marina, to say goodbye.”
Cormac’s face fell and she felt terrible to cause him such disappointment. “I’d like that verra much,” he said quietly.
