Page 37 of Levi
“Do they live far from here?”I ask when we all come back to the living room.
“About thirty minutes at a ranch a few towns over.It butts up to the forest area,” Grandpa informs me.“We’ve never been out there.She’s always come here to us.”
We sit in silence for a while, and the quietness has the walls closing in on me as I think about my wife and daughter with another man.
“How did you find her?”I ask.
“It was the craziest coincidence, really.We had just gotten here on our long drive and decided to make a grocery run before it got too dark.I needed something on the baking aisle and there she was.I knew it was her, even in a ball cap.She was looking over a can of something and I called out to her.She immediately looked over and it was like time stood still.Her face showed so many emotions before we embraced each other.The sound of a little baby drew us back and that was when we saw our precious Halo.After many hugs and tears, Saylor told us not to say anything about seeing her and that she’d come by in a few days to talk with us.That was when we met Brody.”
“Are they together?”I finally ask after a beat, not letting the pain from the words consume me.
“Son,” Grandpa heaves a long breath.He looks over at Grandma, and I can see it in their faces before the words are ever confirmed.Fuck!
“She came to us about two months ago, wanting to have a conversation.At the time, we didn’t know everything that had happened with the two of you; only the bits and pieces before we left Los Angeles and Saylor’s version of what went down between you two.She told us about what Daniel had done on your behalf, and then how she sent you letters and pictures of Halo and how you never came for them.At the time, we saw everything from her side since you never told us you were looking for her.We didn’t want to rock the boat that might hurt us from seeing Saylor and Halo.We thought she might leave and go somewhere else if she thought we were going to blow her cover that Mr.Buttons had put into place for her and Halo’s safety.”Grandma takes a deep breath, and I know the next part is going to be hard to hear.“Brody explained to us that everyone was in on her location, and that this was something that Mr.Buttons and your firm had done multiple times in the past.”
“She came over with Halo around naptime and once our little angel baby was asleep, she asked us to sit down.We thought she was leaving, I did at least.”She looks over at Grandpa and he takes her hand in his.“She asked us what we thought of Brody.He’d always been polite and generous and was great with Halo.She seemed to really take to him and he was always there for Saylor.I knew then what she was there to ask.She wanted to get our blessing, to move on from you, to be with him.”Grandma places her free hand on the side of her face and rubs her temple.
“Son, you have to remember that we didn’t know the truth of what was going on back in LA.Even though you and Saylor only had a short amount of time together, she was so torn up about the thought of moving on from you.We tried so many times to get you to come here for a visit to speak with you and the few times we went to California, but you never would show up.”I can hear the disappointment in her voice.“Had I known our son had gone rogue in starting the divorce, we’d have told her right away what was happening.”
My body shudders as I lean forward, placing my face in my hands.What have I done to us?
“She sat right there, on that same couch, and was wrestling with whether she was doing the right thing, and accepting that her marriage was really over, even if you had moved on.Brody had helped her pick up those pieces that were shattered when everybody’s life imploded over two years ago.”
My mother grabs my hand and tries to release the fist that I’ve made after hearing how Brody wormed his way in.He’s known for the last two years that his uncle was dead and that this situation should’ve never have happened.
“So, she moved on.”I simply say, and stare at the corner where my daughter’s toys are arranged.
“Don’t you dare blame her for this, mister.You were the one who didn’t let anyone in.You kept secrets from everybody and this is of your own making,” Grandpa tells me straight.“We have only been in contact with her for the last year, and she is slowly trying to put the pieces of her life back together.I can only imagine what that poor soul had to endure while she was pregnant, then raise our perfect angel with no family around.I, for one, am glad she had Brody to lean on.Well, not now that we know how he’s lied to her, to keep her for himself.”
He’s right, this is of my own making.We are only here because I thought I knew what was best for her.I did this.Me.I’ve lost my family on the decisions I made, and didn’t listen to others.
“Don’t you go and start that self-loathing.”Grandma shakes her finger at me.“I’ve known you since you were eight years old and the moment Saylor stepped into your life something woke inside of you, like chains were released.I’ve never known you to give up so easily, and I don’t expect it to happen now.Not when your family is on the line.”
“But you just said that she moved on two months ago,” I counter.
“She didn’t know that there was another option.She didn’t think you ever wanted her again.Is it going to be easy?Hell no, but if you don’t want that precious angel calling Brody, daddy, for the rest of her life then I suggest you pull yourself together by your boot straps and fight for what’s yours.”
Hearing Grandma say that, I immediately tense and my brain starts to work up plans on how to get my woman and daughter back, but a dark thought clouds my mind.
“What if I’ve truly pushed her away though?What if she wants nothing to do with me, even after I tell her everything?”
“Levi, there isn’t a time that goes by that I don’t catch her in our room looking over your pictures in there.She doesn’t know that I watch her, but I see her every time.She opens the door and takes Halo in there, she points to you and then whispers in her ear.”My heart aches when she says this because I know what she’s saying, my name to our daughter.“I don’t think she’ll ever be over you.She’s going to need some time to process everything, but you can’t give up hope.”
I nod and try to formulate a plan.
I check the clock and see that it’s getting late, and knowing that my grandparents like to turn in early, I stand.
“I’ll see you both tomorrow.Thank you for taking care of my family when I couldn’t,” I say and grab them both in a tight hug, crushing them to me.
We say our goodbyes and my security and I drive away from their house.My mind is racing, and the farther we get from my family, the more I can’t stand it.
“Jacobs, take us to Jackson’s ranch,” I say in the quiet car.He cuts his eyes over to Mitch quickly and then back to the road, thinking I didn’t catch it, but I did.
“Sir, I think it would be best to go back to the hotel and regroup in the morning.Today was draining, and I think you might have a better head on your shoulders once you’ve had some rest.”Mitch tries to coax.
“I know you mean well Mitch, but there’s no way I can rest knowing that my family is in the same vicinity of me.Take me there.”
“Yes, sir.”
