Page 3 of Wild For You
Once she was satisfied with my choice, after swapping out the first two I selected, she moved toward Colton, who looked around like a trapped animal. She was tiny compared to him; the top of her head barely reached his pectorals. It reminded me of the elephant scared of the little mouse.
“Now, hold still,” she commanded of him as she held out the zucchini, pressing one end to the waistband of hispants. Colton’s eyes widened as he tried crawling back, but the truck held him in place. “Come on, ladies. I need to see those vegetables on these nice young men.” She said it without an ounce of shame in her voice.
Instead of approaching Owen, I clutched the squash against my chest. I noticed Rory’s sisters Autumn and Alex, who was Nate’s wife, were giggling behind their hands as they stood at the side of the crowd.
“Mrs. Hensen,” Rory asked gently, “may I ask what you’re doing exactly?”
She stood back from Colton, and I watched as he heaved out a huge breath. “Oh, well, for the Fall Festival, I’m submitting four art pieces made entirely of vegetables. I want to make sure they’re anatomically correct, of course. I’m nothing if not thorough.”
“So, the art pieces you're creating are of Colton, Nate, and Owen?”
“And Talon, but your significant other isn’t here this morning. Sure is a shame.”
“Why them?”
“I think we can all agree they’re some of the prettiest boys around. My sculptures’ likenesses are uncanny. You can call me the veggie Michaelangelo.”
“Wow, um… how about instead of measuring the vegetables against my brothers-in-law, we simply ask their wives to each pick the one that’s the closest match.”
“Hm… I don’t know.” The old woman turned back around to face Colton, but he had inched away toward the tailgate of the truck.
“Look, I’ll even start.” Rory approached the display and picked up a long cucumber. She eyed it in her palm before handing it over to Mrs. Hensen. “Here, this one is for Talon,” she said of her husband. “I can’t wait to see the final piece.”
Autumn and Alex both selected eggplants similar in size, not as long as the cucumber, but much thicker.
“Now, what do we do about you, Owen?” Mrs. Hensen prompted, then turned her eyes to me, darting her gaze down toward the squash I clinched in my grasp. “Your lovely wife isn’t here this morning, but I’m sure Rory’s friend would be happy to help us out.”
I felt the burn of my embarrassment crawl from the tips of my toes to the top of my head. “Uh… no… I don’t….”
Thankfully, Owen stepped over, removed the squash from my hands, and set it back on the display. He opted for the largest butternut squash on the rack, which was both long and thick. My eyes nearly teared up thinking about petite Aspen, his wife.
“Here you go, ma’am. This is about right. You can verify with my wife later,” he said with a wink that sent most girls in the crowd into a swoon.
“Oh my, dear,” Mrs. Hensen replied, her voice catching midway. “Well, I suppose this will have to do.” Then, speaking to Colton, Mrs. Hensen asked him to bag up the vegetables, and she paid him.
I was still in shock as she walked away.
From behind me, a deep voice asked, “Aw, man, did I miss Mrs. Hensen?”
I turned to find Rory and Talon’s friend, Dean, approaching with a multicolored snow cone in hand.
“Yes, fortunately.”
“Naw, I love that woman.”
“Well, she was measuring penises, so be grateful you weren’t around,” I replied with a snicker.
He guffawed and took a hearty spoonful of the sweet treat. “I’d have the biggest one, for sure. Probably a good thing I wasn’t around. Don’t want to make my friends jealous, you know?”
“How do you know yours is bigger? Do you guys go around with a ruler and measure when you pee, or whatever it is guys do when they’re together?”
“Naw, just look at the length of their forearm. It’s usually a good indicator of size.”
I knew that wasn’t necessarily true, based on the three sexual partners I had in the past, but as I glanced over to the three men gathered at the Sunny Brook Farms booth, I realized it was fairly accurate. Quickly, I glanced at the forearm of the man next to me and nearly jumped back when he flexed his muscles.
Swallowing hard, I extended my hand in hopes of escaping the current conversation. “Hi, I’m Kelsey.”
He switched the hand holding his snow cone and clasped his free one around mine. “Dean.”
