Page 5 of Oz
“Oh, lovely,” I huff. “Can’t a son visit his mother?”
She pats my cheek. “He can and does. He’s a good boy.”
“Are you talking about Shaun?” I ask, and she laughs.
“Of course.” She looks at me. “How’s that James?”
That James,I mouth. She’s referred to him as this after the one memorable time they’d met when he’d tried so hard to prove that he wasn’t a snob by grafting an incredibly bad East End accent onto his rich educated drawl. We’d sat staring at him in wonder for far longer than we should have. It was like watching Dick Van Dyke inMary Poppins, only far worse.
She shakes her head. “Arsehole,” she mutters and goes to switch the kettle on. “What’s he done this time?” she asks over her shoulder.
I slide into a chair at the table and look at the surface which is strewn with shiny travel brochures. “What’s all this? You won the lottery?” I ask, prodding a cruise brochure. I pause. “Tell me you’re not doing papier mâché again, because Simon at the travel agency is only just talking to you again after you got his hopes up by asking for all those luxury destination brochures.”
“I haven’t won the lottery,” she scoffs. “But you’ll never guess who has.”
“Father O’Reilly,” I say faintly.
She shakes her head impatiently. “Auntie Vera.”
“Your sister has won the lottery?”
She smiles. “Not the full thing. She won fifty grand.”
“Jesus. We’re going to have to watch out for the men crawling out of the woodwork willing to do things I don’t want to think about for a slice of that.” My auntie has become man mad since her divorce.
“Don’t spoil her fun,” my mum giggles. I stare at her because there’s a palpable air of excitement about her.
“What’s happening?”
“Vera’s treating me. We’re off on a cruise,” she shrieks.
“No,” I gasp.
She reaches over and pats the magazines and there’s something so soft and awed and almost reverent about the way she touches the expensive papers. Something that makes tears rise in my throat and sorrow in my belly because my mum should always have this.
“That’s good, Ma,” I say softly. “I’m so pleased you’re doing this. You’ll have so much fun.” It’s the truth and I worry slightly that the cruise liner system isn’t quite ready for the Gallagher sisters. Then I stiffen and pull out a magazine. “Tell me you’re not considering this one.”
She nods happily. “That’s the main one at the moment.”
“It’s the Wild Knights Cruise, Ma. I’m not sure about that. You do know there won’t be any men in chainmail with swords.” I pause. “At least I bloody hope not,” I mutter.
She smiles. “Auntie Vera said it sounded so much like her, it’s like it’s meant to be.” She crosses herself piously.
“Ugh,” I groan. “Ma, please don’t say things like that. I’m not sure this is for you.”
She looks cross and picks up the brochure. “It says there are parties every day and it doesn’t sound too posh because clothing is optional for the Captain’s Dinner.”
“Optional being the notable word.” She looks at me, perplexed, so I try another tack. “The parties aren’t your sort of thing,” I say earnestly. “I mean, there are toys involved in this one.”
She looks bemused. “That’s nice. It’ll be handy for the children.”
“It’s adults only, Ma. There’s a reason for that.”
She sighs. “Even better. I’m not a huge fan of children. Always shrieking and crying and making a fuss. I mean, I liked you,” she says hurriedly, misinterpreting my look. “But not any other children. Anyway, it’ll just mean there’ll be more free sun loungers.”
“It means more than that. Ow!” I mutter as she slaps my arm.
“Stop being so overprotective, Oz. It’s time to let me be an adult.” I open my mouth to argue more but she leans forward. “What’s happened to put you in a mood?”
