Page 35 of Oz
I take his cue instantly. In films the retreat is always graceful and it fades to black. That’s not possible with two men in a Volkswagen Polo, so instead, we treat ourselves to the full quiet and awkward rezipping and tucking back in along with the scrambling back over the gearbox that he has to help with a quick boost of my bum.
When I’m back in my seat I look at him. “I’m sorry,” I begin.
“So am I,” he says instantly and I flinch.Wow! Regrets after twenty seconds. Must be a new world record.He carries on talking. “I’m sorry you had a shitty time with your last boss. That’s not the sort of man I am, but I don’t expect you to believe that given the way I’ve just behaved.” He sighs. “I just want you to feel okay here. I don’t want you to feel like you have to leave, and I never want you to be put in a position where you feel you have to do something you don’t want to.”
“This isn’tUpstairs Downstairs,” I start to say but he shakes his head.
“Can we go back to normal, Oz?” He looks hard at me. “I really want that. I’ve grown to consider you a friend and I’d miss the us that we are now if you decided to leave.”
My heart melts because not many people want to keep the real me. I’m too abrasive, too forceful, too flippant. You name it, I’m too much of it. But this kind, clever man wants my friendship, and looking at the vast gulf between the two of us, maybe I should have this rather than trying for more, which would probably be ridiculous anyway. Why would he settle forme of all people, when he could have anyone? Someone clever and wealthy. Someone who could really bring something to help him in his life.
I make myself smile. “I’m not going anywhere, Silas.” I pause. “It was an eventful driving lesson anyway. I’m sure not many people end up in a Buddleia bush.” He looks slightly embarrassed and I can’t help my laugh. “Oh my God, you did. You’re terrible.”
He laughs and starts to tell me the story, but even while he’s talking our eyes are meeting and catching and neither of us mentions the sudden silences as he forgets his words.
Surely friendship will get easier.
Chapter
Seven
Hairy people pleaser
ONE WEEK LATER
Silas
I straighten from my crouched position on the floor as the boy I’ve just given a balloon to runs back to his mum. “Christ, remind me why we do this,” I ask my partner, Theo.
He looks up from his slouch on the counter and grins at me. “Because it’s very good to interact with the general public. Because we might pick up more business. And because we’re two of the on-call vets for the show.” He strikes a pose. “Helping to guard against the spread of infectious diseases and biohazards.”
I grin. “You just want to wear pants over your tights.”
He laughs. “Can’t fool you.” He shrugs. “Anyway, it’s a nice day for handing out balloons with our logo on them.”
I look around at the bustling grounds in Wadebridge that are currently hosting the Royal Cornwall Show. Crowds move and surge past us, stopping to look at the stands all around us, or moving to the central ground where there’s an equestrian show on. The sky is a bright clear blue and when I inhale I can smell straw and hot dogs cooking.
“It is a good day,” I say and then stiffen as a small dark-haired man pushes his way through the crowd. I straighten and watch intently until he comes into full sight and then I slump as I realise it isn’t Oz. I know he’s here today and I’m ridiculously nervous.
I look up and flush when I catch Theo’s very knowing gaze. “Not him?” he asks mock-sympathetically.
“Fuck off!” I whisper as another family moves towards our stand.
He laughs. “No, really. When am I going to meet the almost mythological Oz?”
I shake my head, but I’m prevented from answering him when the family reach me and I’m swamped with answering the mum’s questions about what qualifications her son will need to become a vet.
I answer her questions as fully as I can while casting glances at the boy who is currently in his pram and fast asleep.
“Of course, qualifications might have changed by the time he’s ready for university,” I say smoothly and stiffen as I hear a familiar low chuckle from behind me. I spin around quickly and find Milo and Oz standing with Theo.
Oz is grinning at me. His eyes are covered with dark sunglasses, and he’s wearing bold black and white striped shorts with a tight black t-shirt that proudly shows off his sleeve of tattoos along with tatty black Converse Chuck Taylors. He manages to look out of place, yet completely at home, which tome is one of his most endearing qualities. He’s the most real person I’ve ever met in my life.
I become aware that I’m staring at him and his mouth is tightening in concern the way it has the last week whenever we’ve met and I’ve become as fucking tongue-tied as an awkward teenager. He always manages to look both nonplussed and sympathetic and I hate the idea that he might be pitying me, or even worse, humouring my crush.
I shake my head and walk towards them. “Hey,” I say. “It’s good to see you.”
I don’t need the quirk of Theo’s lips to know that came out as appallingly hearty and I flush, but incredibly, Oz’s lips relax, and he raises his glasses and gives me a soft look.
