Page 90 of This Fate That Guides Us
“I’m starting to get that.” His shoulders slump, his eyes trained on the bag he’s slowly twirling in his hands. “I lost everything when Elizabeth died. My sister and best friend, my parents. She was gone and I was suddenly alone. Then I presented and those feelings intensified. I lashed out at the world, endangered myself and everyone around me. Being shipped to the Alpha Academy didn’t help, at least not at first. Not until I met you.”
I remember the wreckage Elizabeth’s death had caused in my alpha mate. When we met, he was filled with rage. A broken, lonely teenager. Angry at the world with no one to love. It took months of patient support and adoration to convince him I wasn’t going to abandon him like his family had.
“Our pasts may influence us but they don’t determine who we are,” I remind him. “Omen is not her brother nor is she her father, yet you act as if she’s responsible for carrying the weight of their sins.” He opens his mouth to reply but I cut him off. “You’ve devoted your adult life to fighting to protect omega’s from men like Ben Montgomery. We love your determination, your protective nature. Joining you in speaking up against abusers is something I do proudly at your side. But Neb, when will it be enough? If Benjamin Montgomery were to be found guilty and charged with Elizabeth’s death tomorrow, would that be enough? Or would you find someone else to blame? The Pastor? His wife? Their children? Grandchildren? Where does your quest for justice end?”
Nebula sighs, the sound so defeated I almost regret what I said. “I know. I’m going to work on it. When we get back home, I’m going to start seeing a therapist and try to work through my issues revolving around Elizabeth’s death. I don’t want to spend our lives chasing her ghost. But I don’t know if therapy will be enough for me to forgive Omen’s lies.”
“Are they lies? Is hiding her identity as part of the DAU’s designation protection program considered lying? Even if it was done to protect her from the very family who helped destroy your sister?” I shake my head, sitting up so I can look him in the eyes. “None of us will know why Omen kept the secrets she did unless we talk to her.”
“I’ll try.”
I nod, accepting this tentative peace for now. He turns his body toward me, relief clear on his bruised face. He passes the gift bag to me. Peeking inside, I see several new romance paperbacks from my wish list. I don’t hide my grin. He went to a bookstore to get me something as an apology.
While my hurt is still there, pulsing weakly in my chest, I can’t stay mad at him. Fighting with my mates is equally as painful. Leaning my head against his shoulder, I soak in the warmth of his tobacco and vanilla scent. It feels like it’s been ages since I was wrapped against him like this. Our bond sings at the contact, a blanket of comfort drifting over both of us as we soothe the aches in our hearts. Nebula’s arm wraps around my back when he pulls me to sit over his lap so he can bury his face into my neck.
We might not have all the answers and we may not see eye to eye on everything, but as long as we have each other, it will all work out in the end. Fate guides us to where we need to be, we have to believe the path we are traveling won’t bring us to ruin.
CHAPTER FORTY
NOW PLAYING: DARKSigns- Sleep Token
I jolt awake, my heart racing and my ears ringing. The slightly familiar faded wallpaper of my safe house bedroom comes into focus when I manage to calm my breathing. I don’t remember the dream I was having, but with the way my skin crawls, I assume it’s from the day I left home. For several months after I was brought into the DAU, I had nightmares about that day. The memory twisted in each one to where I was caught before I could escape.
Soft rapping in the distance startles me. No one should be visiting. It puts us at risk.
I throw on a pair of pajama pants and a zip-up jacket before tiptoeing to the stairs. Lex’s voice carries up the stairs, followed by Donovan. I rush down the steps to see what is going on only toslide to a halt when I see Shepherd and Foster standing behind the older alpha.
“Sarah?” My birth name is called from the corner, the sound muffled. I blink when the guys part to reveal Hannah standing behind them. My eyes water and for a moment I’m sure sleep deprivation has made me start hallucinating. I haven’t seen my sister since the day I presented five years ago…
“You need to run, Sarah. You know what Father will do if he finds out you’ve presented and aren’t a beta.”
My body aches from the intensity of the fever flowing through me. Cramps have me doubling over in pain. I don’t know enough about being an omega to know if this level of pain is normal. I can barely focus on the frantic words pouring from my sister’s mouth. I just want to sleep. It’s too bright sitting in her spacious living room. The walls too far away.
Why did I have to be an omega?
My sister's nails dig into my arms as she pulls me from the couch. My mind barely registers the pain. I know it isn’t intentional. She’s worried. Afraid of what will happen if someone stumbles upon us and word gets to my parents before I can find a way out of Whitlan. Out of New Hampshire.
If the haze of this fever would break, I’d be hysterical from the situation I’ve found myself in. Growing up as the youngest daughter of the Montgomery family, I expected to be a beta. My parents are both betas, which should have been passed down to their children. My father, the most influential Pastor in the state of New Hampshire, is the loudest advocate against everything designation-related.
Packs, interpack relations, alphas and omegas. In his eyes, non-beta designations were placed among us as a test of the strength of our faith. If you give in to the instinctual nature of an alpha or an omega, you aren’t worthy of forgiveness or acceptance.
Despite the adamancy of my father’s sermons while growing up, I’d never understood the depth of his hatred toward non-betas. Not until my big brother, Ben, presented during his senior year of high school. He’s an alpha. The punishment he was forced to endure as penance for falling into what my family considers sin was harsh enough I feared he wouldn’t survive the damage to his body.
A similar, or most likely more traumatic, Fate awaits me if my parents ever discover I’m an omega.
The mid-April air helps to cool my overheated skin. My mind settles enough for me to focus on what is happening. A black car pulls through the gate to Hannah’s lavish home. A whine slips from my lips as she shoves me into the backseat. Her light cherry almond scent comforts me and my omega protests at the loss of familiar contact. Especially with the cloying scent of overripe blackberries clinging to the vehicle's interior.
“Hush now, Sarah,” Hannah whispers. Tears stream down her cheeks and her posh top knot is in disarray, leaving strands of her golden brown hair falling down her back. Warm chocolate eyes stare back at me for a moment. So full of sadness. Of grief. “You’re a fighter, my little gremlin. You will survive this and find a life worthy of living. Now go, escape this obstinate state before it is too late.”
Sobs wrack my body as the door closes. The cramps in my stomach grow stronger with the onslaught of distress my emotions are causing within my body.
Life as I know it is over. While I won’t mourn the loss of the choiceless future my father has laid out for me, leaving everything–everyone–behind isn’t as easy as I once imagined.
Staring at my sister, I take in all the ways she’s changed in the years since I left. Her face thinner and her eyes duller. Hergolden blonde hair is shorter. The most obvious difference is the large rounded belly and the tiny girl sitting on her hip.
“H-Hannah?” I stammer as I stumble toward her. My arms wrap around her, squishing my niece between us–I have a niece! Sweet cherries and almond flood my senses as I hug her. She’s here, my sister is really here! Safe from our horrible father and her indifferent husband.
“Oh, little gremlin, I’ve missed you so,” she whispers in my ear. Her voice is watery and I can see the tears lining her lashes when we pull back. “Sarah–well I guess you prefer to go by Omen now don’t you?”
