Page 26 of Shift in the Blood
“You’re not stopping me.” She didn’t even hesitate.
“You can’t go.”
“I can and I will.” She came out toward me from around her bed. “Ever since Mom and Dad died, you’ve treated me like a little kid, barely able to wipe my nose or sign my own name.”
Her words stung like a herd of marauding jelly fish. I could feel them all over my body, moving toward my soul. “I have not. I’ve done what I needed to, what they would have done. Keep you in school, make sure you had what you needed, and kept you safe.”
“And what about you?” Carina’s face was red.
“What about me?”
“You’ve been off doing whatever.” She waved a hand with an angry jerk. “Leaving poor little Carina to just be here. I didn’t need another parent, Clara. I needed my sister. But you were too busy with your life to be that.”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. This was what she thought of me? Of all the worry, and sleepless nights, and putting up with Maxim Damn Popov and all his gross ass friends? That I was out living the high life? Are you kidding me? “I obviously didn’t help you mature, if this is what you think of me.” I could feel my temper rising. Not a good sign.
“No, you were too busy ordering me around and doing whatever you wanted to do.” Her eyes narrowed. “You can’t stop me. If you try, I’ll take this to court, and sue the pants off you.”
“For what?” A sharp laugh knifed through me. “For taking care of you? Making sure you went to college? With no student loans, I might add. Yeah, your life is so hard, Carina. How many of your friends have jobs? Who are eating ramen noodles? Not you. And that’s all due to me, to me working my ass off, making sure that you always had what you needed.”
“But not what I wanted.”
“Oh, boo hoo.” My temper flared, and with that, I gave up. “I’ve sacrificed the last five years of my life to make sure that you’d be okay. Yeah, yeah, I know you didn’t ask for it. But I went to court, and argued so that I could be your guardian. The court system wanted to take you to a foster home. Did you know that? I talked them out of it, because I showed them that I had a job, and plans, and a little bit of money. I didn’t have to do that. I could have let you spend the last year of high school in some foster home, and definitely gone and done my own thing. The court advocate even asked me why I didn’t do just that.”
I’d also nearly punched the court advocate in the nose, but I wasn’t brining that up now.
Her mouth fell open, and she looked like she wasn’t sure what to say. Good. Damn ingrate. Not that I regretted one second, but a little appreciation would do a lot for me. I felt unappreciated most of the time. No one understood. None of my classmates had a kid to take care of, back when I was in school. And none of my friends, such as they might be, had kids either. It was just me.
I’d been alone and lonely for the past five years. Now I was being told that it didn’t mean shit. “Do what you want, Carina. Everything I’ve done, all the shit I’ve put up with, the risks, all of it—it was to keep you and me safe, to keep us fed, in a decent apartment and not some roach-laden rathole. That’s been my whole life. Making sure that I kept the promise I made to Mom and Dad. I’m done.”
I pivoted and marched back to my room.
Carina called out. “Clara!”
Ignoring her, I slammed my door, feeling childishly better, and yanked my suitcases down out of my closet. One of the first things I’d bought was good suitcases, in case we ever needed to get out of somewhere fast. One move in the middle of the night with half our stuff in trash bags was enough for me. Never again.
I tossed my clothes, and the things on my dresser into the suitcases, not caring that everything was a mess. It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered up until now, apparently. My entire adult life thus far had been wasted.
Faster than I thought possible, my bags were packed. I didn’t care about the household things. After Mom and Dad died, and we had to move a couple of times, I learned that things were just things. Me and Carina were what was important.
My eyes welled with tears. I stood in front of the door to my room, feeling my throat begin to ache.I’m not breaking down right now. Not now.
Yanking the door open, I called out. “Keep the dishes. You have my number.” I marched to the front door, and started moving my suitcases out into the hallway.
“Clara.” Carina came out of her room, and stood in the living room.
I moved around her, taking a suitcase in each hand. I walked back and forth passed her two more times. I had a lot of suitcases. So what? When the last one was out the door, I turned back toward my sister, the only person I’d loved for the past five years. “It would be nice if you sent me your address when you got to Seattle. Just so I know where you are.”
“So you can track me down?”
It was like she couldn’t help herself.
“No. You’ve made yourself clear. Good luck.” I walked out and shut the door behind me. I didn’t want to hear whatever else she might say, or get into another fight.
But I couldn’t hold my sobs once I got to the car where Neville waited.
“Whoa! Hey, what’s wrong?” He was instantly concerned.
“Sister stuff. Can you help me get the rest of the bags?”
