Page 43 of Nostalgia
His words grounded me. They brought me back to reality. A few weeks? He hadn't told me. How had he told my father first? All the mornings I had been laid up in bed being depressed... They had a lot of time to talk about anything.
We left the house and the dry heat smacked me silly. "Is that true?"
Derek sat me down on the front step. "Yes."
"Why didn't you tell me?" I tried to cover the fact that I was still in my jammies and wore no bra.
Derek looked away. "Would it have changed anything? You have too much on your plate with your family. I wanted to enjoy this time with you without my deployment looming over our heads."
He had given up his little vacation time to spend with me and I had gone and ruined it with my depressed self. "Do you want to do touristy things?"
He rubbed his jaw like he was thinking about it. "After you go on a run with me."
I shook my head. "No, I don't think so."
"Do you want to go on a run with me, thrown over my shoulder then?" It was certainly tempting, but the thought of my boobs escaping my tank top was mortifying.
“Can I put on a sports bra first?” I chewed on my thumbnail nervously.
He nodded once. “Yes, but if you’re longer than ten minutes your dad has approved me taking your door off of its hinges.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “You wouldn’t dare.”
He grinned that million-dollar smile and I was putty. “Oh, but I would.”
Dammit, I was a goner when it came to him and I didn’t think it was going to change anytime soon.
Kia came around and I finally got the phone call. I was chomping down on a sandwich when he called Dad. He was ready to see me but he didn't know about Derek. Which was fine, because Derek was still going to tag along. I didn't care if he didn't want him there. Where I went, Derek was sure to follow. I preferred it that way. It gave me comfort in this crazy turbulent world of mine. To know I had some kind of protection was enough.
When we got to Kia's home there were homemade gifts all over the porch with various wildflowers. Emotions clogged my throat. I pushed the front door open and found my brother sitting on the couch smoking a cigar while watching football. He jumped up and yelled at the TV. Leave it to him to almost die and still watch football like a junky. I didn't know where he had picked it up from because Dad never watched TV. He had muttered it was white bullshit too many times to count and refused to give in. He was traditional like that.
Derek trailed behind me like the protective shadow he was. Kia turned the TV off and stared us down. "Why'd you have to go and do that?"
I raised my eyebrows. "Do what?"
"Get emotional in my room."
"You could hear me?" I felt the blood leave my face. Some of the things I had said were because I knew he wouldn't remember them or he couldn't hear me. Guess the spirits were mocking me now.
His right arm was in a sling and a cast. He shrugged then readjusted his arm and scowled. "I guess. I remember what you said and I don't like it one bit. I want names, Aiyanna. I want names now."
Derek moved in front of me and they stared each other down. I rested my hand on his back. I could fight my own battles. I appreciated his concern though. I stepped around him and gave my brother a death stare. You wouldn't have known he had been dying just a few days prior. He looked fine now and I was pretty sure the cigar wasn't doc approved.
"I don't have names." I would have willingly gave them. I would have ratted out anyone that had done me harm in those first years but all I cared about was surviving.
"How can you not have names?" Kia boomed. "Do you know how many similar cases I deal within a year? Way too many. Let me put bad people away, Aiya."
Maze came out of the kitchen with a glass of water, she set it down next to her husband before she wrapped her arms around him. "You can't demand things like this, Kia. Trauma does strange things to people. You have no idea how she even escaped."
I was starting to like her more. She seemed to put out Kia’s inner fire.
Kia’s voice broke and he looked away, like he couldn’t bear to show his emotions. “How can I protect my daughters with so much evil in this world? I couldn’t even protect my sister.”
I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know where to start so all I did was rush to my brother’s side and wrap him in a hug. A hug that was long overdue. He wrapped his good arm around me and pressed his lips to my hair. “You don’t have to protect me now.”
Derek took a step forward. “She is in good hands.”
I rolled my eyes and smiled softly. “I can protectmyself.”
