Page 14 of The Grump I Loathe
Leigh looked intrigued as she scribbled on her interview sheet. “Only six?” she said teasingly. “What’s your favorite part?”
“That the game adapts really well to player choice,” Eddie said, her smile openly friendly as she complimented aspects of the game. The way she lit up talking about something she was passionate about was… No, I had to put a stop to this. “So one decision not only affects the narrative, but also how other in-game characters treat you and ultimately the ending. I think it’s those little details that make all the difference in the storytelling. I’ve actually started to adapt that into my own work. I want players to be able to replay my games and have a unique experience each time, discovering more of the story, picking up on new clues, new Easter eggs. It’s exactly the kind of gameplay that will keep them coming back for more.”
Max turned to me, mouthingspot-on.Dammit, that was the last straw.
“Why are you still sitting?” I asked as I shot to my feet.
Eddie’s eyebrow arched. Teasing. Challenging. “Isn’t that usually what chairs are for?”
Max shot me a questioning look while Leigh pursed her lips. “What’s going on?”
I coughed, clearing my throat as I buttoned my suit jacket. “Narrative design is about wearing a lot of different hats, about adapting. If she wants to show us she’s up to the job, Eddie needs to demonstrate that she’s able to think on her feet. Let’s go on a field trip.”
“Ilovefield trips,” Eddie said, unfazed.
Ignoring the curious looks all around, I led the group out of the conference room and into another room where we had a playtest ofShadow’s vertical slice set up—the short sequence of finished gameplay we’d perfected for testing and showing to investors.
“Here,” I said to Eddie as the team piled into the room already packed with playtesters. “Watch the game, play it if you feel like you need to, and tell me what itneeds.”
“Connor,” Leigh started. “She hasn’t even read the briefing.”
I held my hand up, staring Eddie down, daring her to refuse, to argue, to do anything that would allow me to send her packing. Preferably straight into a vat of hot sauce. Because I needed the rest of the team to see what I already had: That Eddie was mouthy and obnoxious, and the last thing we needed was her on the team. She wasn’t the right fit. She didn’t have what it took to work for LockMill.
More importantly, I needed her out of here and out of my life before… before what? Before anyone noticed I might be attracted to the bane of my existence? Before I did something monumentally stupid like wondering what those smart-ass lips would taste like?
Absolutely not.
“Sounds likefun,” Eddie said, shooting me a smug grin. She borrowed a controller from one of the playtesters, plopped down on the provided couch, and dove right in. “Wait, how do you jump again?” she asked the playtester beside her.
“Left trigger,” he replied. “But you need to time it right or you’ll miss that platform.”
“What do you think of the level design?” Eddie asked him after a beat. “Enough obstacles?”
“I’m definitely having fun, just sort of wish there was something to fire a ray gun at, you know?”
Eddie nodded, running her character through the level. I watched her intently, my eyes flickering from Leigh to Max to Darius. I’d wanted to put Eddie on the spot, to prove that she couldn’t handle the challenges of this job, but rather than being rattled, she rose to the challenge. Finally, Eddie hit pause.
“Okay,” she said, clapping her hands together. “First off, I really love the atmosphere. You immediately get a sense of that isolation and mystery in deep space that worked so well in the first game.”
Leigh nodded, taking in Eddie’s observations like they were legitimate. That’s not what I’d intended. Why was she doing so damn well? She should already be gone.
“In my opinion, though,” Eddie continued, then drew in a breath and paused, seeming to collect her thoughts.
Finally, I thought,time for her to crash and burn.
“There’s room to push player engagement with the story a bit more. Juni’s voiceover during the opening sequence is a little heavy on exposition. The goal is immersion, right? I’d say let the player discover more through voice logs, environmental clues…old photos. That kind of stuff. I want to be hooked from the start, chasing the clues to some end goal, and right now I don’t know if the opening has me fully invested.”
No, dammit!Why was this backfiring on me?
“And what about that other note?” Leigh asked. “Have something to shoot at?”
“I mean,” Eddie grinned. “I wouldn’t say no to breaking out a blaster. But what I’m really interested in is the bits of alien lore sprinkled in throughout this sequence. We met the aliens as the enemy in the lastgame, and from what I’m picking up, it feels like you’re planning to shift that dynamic into something new here. So maybe we’re meeting the aliens on level footing in this game or even as reluctant partners to make way for a bigger and badder enemy?”
Max rubbed his jaw, hiding a smile behind his hand. Leigh caught my eye, the corner of her mouth twitching.No, no, no!Eddie wasn’t supposed to be picking up the threads Tristan left. And why was everyone smiling and nodding?
“What do you think that should look like, if weareplanning to shift the dynamic with the aliens?” Leigh asked. “What would be your suggestion?”
Eddie drummed her fingers against her chin. “I’d suggest a POV shift. Let’s open with the aliens—establish them as creatures in need of help from the outset to make our audience sympathetic to their cause. After that, we smash cut to Juni on the ship, receiving the distress signal. That sets her condensed voiceover in motion, followed by some exploration to give us a chance to work in more explanations.”
