Page 122 of Kissed By the Gods
But I don’t know what she did when I was under.
Four days. Four whole godsdamn days flat on my back in this bed, unconscious while she pulled pain from my marrow, dug into memories that were never meant to be touched.
And judging by the look of her—jaw clenched, eyes shadowed, cheeks sunken—she did too much.
Siofra’s been in and out of the room, all sharp elbows and boundless energy, fetching whatever Elowen asks of her like she’s on some sort of divine mission. Honestly, if you ask me, the kid’s still young enough to need a nursemaid. She shouldn’t be elbow-deep in someone else’s blood.
Of course, no one does ask me, so her constant chatter fills the room. At least she’s talking about something useful.
“...and then Leina demanded they go after you! And then?—”
“How does a little girl know so much about Synod business?” I cut in, not even trying to hide the edge in my voice. Judging by the way Siofra’s describing it, she was practically in the courtyard when Leina lit the world on fire.
Sweet Thayana. What a godsdamn disaster. Because Leina didn’t have enough problems or enemies, she needed to publicly announce that she’s a walking, talking, breathing harbinger of death. Likely the most dangerous gifted of our times.
I run a shaking hand over my face. Again.
Siofra, oblivious to my inner turmoil, huffs, putting her hands on her hips. “I’m not a little girl.”
“Indeed you’re not,” Elowen says, playing peacemaker. “You’re a healer. Very grownup indeed.”
Siofra stands taller, taking a more regal stance, her chin lifted with pride and her shoulders squared, looking every bit the princess she is. She smirks, raising an eyebrow at me as if to say,you see, peasant?
“And then an entire contingent flew after you, mostly Stormriven because Archon Robias led the contingent himself,” Siofra continues. My eyebrows jerk up at that little bit of information. I didn’t think anything would surprise me after hearing that Leina is a godsdamn veilstrider, but an archon leaving the Synod is a rare thing, indeed.
Elowen, never oblivious, watches me carefully, her eyes taking in every nuance of my expression even as she preparesanother tonic. But I’m also watching her. And her hands shake before she sets down the jar she’s working on with a bit more force than necessary. The liquid sloshes to the rim.
“Siofra, come pour this,” she says. I narrow my eyes at her, to say:I saw that.
She meets my gaze, lips pressed tight in silent defiance.
Siofra doesn’t seem to notice the tension crackling between us. She bounces over, still chattering.
“...they were going to fly all the way to Solmire Island,” she says, grabbing the jar, “but Einarr had already gotten you to Carrisfal! Isn’t that wild? They say he didn’t stop at any of the other islands, which shouldn’t even be possible, especially with the condition of his lungs from all the ash!”
My jaw tightens. There's a weight settling in my chest again, slow and familiar.
Guilt.
Godsdammit, Einarr.
Elowen told me he was out cold for days, too. But he finally came around yesterday, and from what she said, the healers for the faravars have been working on him nonstop in Carrisfal. I can feel him now, tucked up against my mind like a stone wall—unyielding, silent, solid. Even when he's irritated beyond reason—and he is right now—he’s still there. Still with me.
He’s making the flight from Carrisfal to the Synod today. Alone.
I hate that.
I’m restless. Edgy, and pacing even if only in my mind, waiting for him to arrive. Neither of us likes being this far apart.
Siofra brings over the tonic—a nasty mix of golden thread and yarrow—but I down it without comment. I know better than to complain to Elowen.
“When they brought you in, Leina was still supposed to be in the infirmary, too, but she convinced Elowen to let her make apallet in your room. She slept on the floor with us, like she was a healer herself. She even changed your?—”
“Siofra,” Elowen says sharply. The girl blinks, startled, then clamps her mouth shut. I’m pretty sure Elowen is the only person she listens to. A rare silence follows—but not when I wanted it.
“I think that’s quite enough. It’s time for our patient to rest.”
I glare at Elowen. The princess-turned-healer looks away, avoiding eye contact with me. That’s another detail Elowen left out in her rendition of this story. Leina was here, with me. And knowing that ... Gods. It soothes something in me I didn’t even realize was raw.
