Page 74 of The Moonstone Governess
But his fear of ever loving because of his cruel upbringing was a barrier that stood between them, and no amount of kisses would convince him otherwise.
His rank was also an enormous barrier, although he did not appear to find it as important as she did.
Was it possible he and his friend Jax, with respect to Felicity, were willing to ignore the demands placed on them by their titles and marry commoners? They might have gotten away with it if she and Felicity were heiresses.
But they weren’t.
Of greatest concern were her lingering doubts. Was she ready to believe that Daire cared for her? He had every reason to seduce her, pretend to court her. He wanted Stoningham Manor. Was this his way of tricking her out of it? And had he brought his friend in on the ruse? Pretending to court two spinsters. Lulling everyone into complacency.
Well, he had not attempted to lure her into his bed, although he claimed to crave her body. Perhaps her doubts about Daire’s feelings for her would resolve in time.
But this fear of his, this worry he had a monster lurking within him, was quite real. She saw the worry in his eyes and the genuine fear in Matthew.
How was she to convince Daire that he did not have a cruel heart?
He needed time, just as he had said. He needed people not to push him and dismiss his fears as groundless.
She ran back to the house, leaving him alone in the field of poppies.
In any event, she had to ready Matthew for their excursion into town. He would enjoy the tour of Fort Arundel and the new hospital built to take in the overflow of wounded soldiers from Plymouth.
Once she and Matthew were ready, she knocked at Duchess Juliana’s door. The duchess’s lady’s maid opened the door.
The room was dark, and it took Brenna a moment for her eyes to adjust to the lack of light. “Oh, my dear,” Juliana said, her voice sounding weak as she lay burrowed under her covers. “Please convey my apologies to Viscount Brennan. But do go on ahead with Matthew. He is so looking forward to the tour.”
“Very well, Your Grace. Is there anything I can do for you?”
“No, dear. I shall be fine. A little too much sun yesterday, I fear. It has brought on a megrim. I have these often.”
Brenna did not know whether to summon Daire, but decided to leave it alone for now. She would send word if Juliana took a turn for the worse. “Very well.”
*
As expected, Matthewwas quite fascinated by the fort and soldiers, his smile broad and eyes gleaming as the fort commander, Fionn Brennan, showed them around.
Afterward, he escorted them to Mrs. Halsey’s tea shop, where they met his wife, Chloe, and the four of them had tea and cakes together.
Matthew chatted with Viscount Brennan, excitedly asking question after question about the ancient fort and the life of a soldier. “This is what I want to be,” the boy declared. “Or I might be a gardener. I’m growing strawberries.”
The viscount was duly impressed. “We have a small garden beside the hospital. Did you notice it, Matthew? Would you like to plant strawberries there? I’m not sure the soil is rich enough or if there is enough sunlight. I am not good with matters of gardening. But I would be grateful if you tried.”
Matthew was overjoyed. “Yes! Miss Brenna, is that all right?”
He had taken to calling her by that name and Felicity as Miss Felicity to distinguish them, since they both had the family name of Angel. Brenna heartily approved of the idea. “That will be a fun project. Give us a couple of days to get our plants and proper soil and supplies gathered.”
By the time they parted ways with the viscount and his wife, Matthew was floating like a bird in the air. Brenna took a moment to thank the viscount profusely. “Just look at him. Have you ever seen a happier child?”
“I know what his life must have been like, having lived through similar. It is worth everything to see his smile.”
Chloe was equally gracious. “We will have you all over to Moonstone Cottage soon,” she promised. “Please let us know if there is anything we can do for Duchess Juliana.”
“I will.” Brenna thanked them again and walked off with Matthew.
Daire happened to be coming out of the inn as they strolled by. The boy immediately stopped smiling and ducked behind Brenna. “Matthew, he is not your father. Your Uncle Daire loves you. Has he not been nice to you?”
The lad nodded, but still was not convinced to trust him.
She saw the pain etched on Daire’s face the moment he noticed them and saw his nephew already hiding behind her gown.
