Page 132 of He Who Ignites The Flame
Hurt filled Barrett’s eyes.
“I can’t look at you right now. He wouldn’t have done it if he hadn’t realized...” My voice broke.
If he hadn’t realized Barrett was my mate...
Tears rolled down my cheeks, my hands hanging limp at my side as a hollow cold filled me. “Why did it have to be you?”
His hands balled into fists, his eyes darting around, as if searching for what he might say before he stormed closer. “You wish it had been me instead of him? That he was here telling you I was dead?"
I shrank back, his words burning me in more ways than I could have imagined. My lips parted to tell him that wasn’t what I had meant, but he continued.
“You think I don’t wish I was the one who’d fallen?” he said, his voice laced with furious agony. “You wish I’d died? Well, so do I! You hate me for what I am? So do I! I wish so badly I could go back in time and take his place because trust me, Thalia, I’d do it in a fucking heartbeat!”
He stormed closer, his presence too much for me to bear. “Don’t worry, you won’t have to see my fucking face anymore.”
I opened my mouth, brows furrowing. “What?—”
“You’re off patrol, effective tonight,” he said, his voice a powerful command.
“You can’t do tha?—”
“I outrank you,” he said, his voice bitter. “You turned Lucia down for that position, remember?”
“Fuck you!” I shouted as I shoved him back, tears welling in my eyes as anger swelled in my chest, the beast baring its teeth.
“Yeah, fuck me!” he shouted, slamming his still-bloodied fist against his chest. “Hate me, I fucking deserve every bit of it.”
I pushed off the wall and ducked through the front door, slamming it in his face before falling back against it, my chest expanding as I tried and failed to breathe before caving to the agony.
57
BARRETT
The sound of her slammed door echoed endlessly across the vast hollowness of my mind, the salt of her tears, the scent of her sorrow, overwhelming my senses.
Why did it have to be you?
I clutched at my chest, the flames deep within me sputtering as they tried to reignite, biting at the fuel of her words. The rain had stopped long ago, but the sound of its roar still lingered in my mind, the smell of Micah’s blood still clinging to me in a way that left me wondering if I’d ever truly be able to wash my skin of it.
Why did it have to be me?
My boots scuffed against the pavement as I stumbled from her door, my heart racing. I balled my hands into fists as the flames roared to life, catching on the hurt left in her wake and exploding around me as I fell to my knees. I cried out to the heavens, to Celestia, to whoever might listen. The fire vanished just as quickly as it erupted, leaving the pavementaround me hot and soft, any water from the rain turning to steam in the air. I slumped on my knees, head hanging forward in defeat.
I lifted my gaze to her door as I imagined her on the other side, imagined tears spilling down her cheeks, her hand clutching at her faded binding tattoo. I knew she hadn’t meant what she said, and yet, I’d fed into it, bit back at her when she was wounded.
The heat of her anger was far sweeter than the salty bitterness of her tears. If anger was what got her through this, if anger was all I got to taste of her from this moment onward, then I would be the spark to ignite the flame.
To be continued...
To be continued in book 3 of the shadow and moonlight series and book 2 in the BarrettxThalia Duology
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