Page 62 of To Ashes and Dust
“Oh shut it, you lost the bet. You thought she’d set Tobias on fire,” Vincent chimed in from his other side.
I balked at him. “You seriously thought I was going to set someone on fire?”
Barrett elbowed Vincent as he huffed a laugh before saying, “I was hopeful. Those meetings are boring, we needed something to liven them up.”
“I think Damien livened it up quite a bit,” Thalia said, her head dipping as she snickered.
“I swear he pissed his pants,” Barrett added, his steel eyes sliding to me, and I bit back the laugh bubbling up in my chest.
“I’m glad you brought up the laws regarding females in the aristocracy,” she said, her face softening as she turned to me. “I wish someone had changed them earlier. So many females have suffered because of them.”
Her eyes flickered to Barrett, who had gone quiet. She reached out a tentative hand, as if she were going to take hold of his, but she drew it back, hesitation flitting across her face. My heart fluttered at the sign of affection, but then my thoughts narrowed in on her words, on the way Barrett reacted. Did he know someone affected by the laws?
I tilted my head just enough to catch a glimpse of his face, of the muscle feathering in his jaw, his eyes burning into the swirling amber liquid in his glass, and an icy hot sensation crawled over my skin. He drew a deep breath, blinking, as if he were shoving whatever he was feeling down and took a swig of his drink.
It wasn’t my place to ask, though I wanted to. Instead, I leaned in to whisper in Thalia’s ear, eager to change the subject. “So, are you guys...”
She glanced at me, pale brows raised, and the look of surprise melted into a bashful one, her cheeks flushing. “It’s complicated.”
“You girls whisperin’ about me over here?” Barrett asked, tilting his head to see around her.
“Not every conversation revolves around you, numbskull,” Thalia said, but for a moment, something like regret flashed across her eyes, and she almost recoiled.
“Such hostility,” Barrett said with a teasing grin. “And here I thought you were getting all sweet on me.”
Thalia rose to her feet, hands planted on the counter. “Why is everything a joke to you?”
I stiffened.
Barrett raised his hands in surrender. “Woah! I didn’t say it was.”
“Then perhaps you could just be honest and talk like you mean it,” Thalia snapped back. “I’ve been trying to get you to open up to me for days now, but you keep avoiding the subject. It’s obviously eating at you.”
His face hardened, his irritation burning its way over my skin. . “I’m not avoiding anything.”
“Then why won’t you talk about what happened the other night? Why did you shut me out? Why won’t you open up more about Cali? You won’t talk to Salwa about what happened to her. You can’t keep shoving it down. You can’t keep doing this to yourself!”
My eyes darted between them. Cali?
“Don’t you dare bring my sister into this,” he growled, and something like shame darkened his face as he failed to hold her gaze.
Something curdled in my stomach at the mention of a sister I’d never heard of—a sister I hadn’t even known existed. I struggled to process it. I’d spent so much time with him. He’d mentioned nothing about her... or any of his family for that matter.
“Are you just going to pretend it never happened? It did, Barrett… and it’s not your fault,” Thalia said lowly, placing a hand on his shoulder.
He jerked his shoulder from her grasp. “You know nothing.”
“There was no way you could’ve stopped it, you were young,” she said, her tone reassuring despite the anger brimming beneath the surface.
Barrett huffed, turning from her.
“Seriously? That’s it?” When he didn’t respond, she groaned. “Gods, you never change.”
A muscle ticked in Barrett’s jaw before he shot to his feet, his stool falling over, and the bar went quiet. “You think I enjoy being like this, Thalia? You think I enjoy fucking everything up? You think I haven’t questioned every decision I’ve ever made wondering if it was the right one or if it cost someone their life?”
Thalia stiffened, and I glanced at Damien and the others, who had silenced their conversations, now very aware of the argument building at the bar.
Barrett didn’t seem to care of the audience, continuing. “It goes both ways. You can’t push me to talk but refuse to open up about Micah.”
