Page 63 of For the Win
“From the will.”
“Oh.Oh. Right.” The one he was supposed to marry to get his inheritance. How could I have possibly forgotten that insane tidbit from breakfast?
“She came to my table and introduced herself. She knew who I was and tried to flirt, but she looked nervous. Embarrassed and guilty. I told her I wasn’t interested and went to the bar. But at some point in our brief conversation, someone snapped a picture. I assume Ali used it to prove to my father that I’d already shown an interest in this woman. That marrying her would be just as good for me as it was for them, but because I wasshyI would need convincing.”
He doesn’t like being called shy. And that cousin is a real piece of work. “Are we giving your father the benefit of the doubt now?”
“Bellamy is certain that’s what happened. To be fair, he knew him better than I did. He said he had flaws, but he wouldn’t havetaken that action if he’d had all the facts.” He pauses and sets down his bag. “It’s important for you to know that I was never with her, Win. That I’d never marry anyone for money, and that if I was with someone, I wouldneverbe unfaithful to them. That’s not who I am.”
“I do know that, Michael.” My heart feels like it’s trying to climb up my throat. “I don’t have a single doubt about what kind of man you are. I…appreciate that about you.”
I love that about you.
I can’t think about it right now.
He stares at me for a long moment, waiting for more. When I don’t respond, he looks back to his tray and starts to work again. “Your friend seems to like Veronica.”
My shoulders relax, because I’m perfectly comfortable talking about someone else’s love life. “Oh, he does. This is the first time in years that he’s been into someone who’s into him right back. I have a good feeling about it. I bet they’ll be married by next year.”
And then what? I’ll have an apartment to myself. I don’t really need a roommate to pay my bills anymore. It’ll be tight, but I’ll manage. Living on my own might be an adventure. I can stream musicals twenty-four-seven. I can add people from work to my book club with Bex and make fancy drinks for our meetings without being teased. I’ll have less cleaning to do. It might be great.
Or I could convince Connor and Veronica to buy a home with a garage apartment so they’ll have a future babysitter on call. Maybe move in with Val until he gets over Bex and finds his own someone.
My future is full of so many moderately pathetic possibilities.
“Youarea romantic,” he murmurs.
“No, I’m not.” And this subject isn’t working for me either. “Can I ask you something that’s been bugging me?”
He nods.
“Why did you go to work for your father in the first place? And a follow up question, why did you stay when they treated you like crap?”
I knew why I was still at my job, even after the obstacles started feeling like mountains I wasn’t sure I could overcome. But he had other options.
Michael looks down at his hands. “I’d only met my father once before my college graduation. I was twelve and he came to visit the private school I was actively trying to get thrown out of. He explained that he wanted me to join the family business. It was why he’d picked that school. Why he cared so much about my education. He told me I was a Demir, and that came with certain expectations.” His lips thinned. “After that visit, I buckled down and accepted his challenge. I learned multiple languages, majored in both accounting and finance, and graduated at the top of my class. That day was the first and only time he told me he was proud of me.”
He frowned. “In hindsight, I think that was all I really wanted. I didn’t approve of who he was, how he ran his business or how he lived his life, but for some reason, I needed his acceptance. I kept working for it right up until he died. I know you’ll say I should have left years ago,” he adds. “But I was good at my job and I knew that company. And I wasn’t ready to make any changes until now.”
I blow out a hard breath. I can picture it so clearly, that child trying to prove his worth. Trying to win the affection of someone who didn’t deserve his.
Yet another reason Michael Demir isn’t a starter boyfriend. His past and mine are similar in all the wrong ways. Haven’t I been trying to prove I’m worth keeping around for years now? The best friend. The best teacher. All while staying away frommen that I know don’t do casual because I don’t want to hurt them.
That’s the joke of it all, you know. It was never about hurting them. It was about me.Idon’t want to be hurt.Idon’t want to raise my hopes only to have them shatter. It’s a purely selfish survival instinct. An instinct that I was able to shut off for a few days until we got back to the lodge and it resurfaced with a vengeance.
He could hurt me.
“What is it, Win? Did I say something that upset you?”
“You didn’t, no.” I feel my nails digging into the palms of my hands. “I just hate that he put you through that. A parent is supposed to love their child, Michael. Even if they didn’t mean to conceive, a decent person is supposed to care whether a kid—any kid—lives or dies. It used to be wired into us as humans, you know. It’s how we survived and evolved. We didn’t have killer instincts, protective shells or long claws. We were easier to kill than a slug on the ground, but we had compassion, community and the protection that came from huddling together and sharing resources and knowledge. Why is it so easy now for people to treat their children like competition, or afterthoughts, or garbage?”
I don’t realize I’ve hopped off the stool and am backing away until Michael takes a step toward me. “Stop, Win. Stop and talk to me. This isn’t about my father, is it?”
My head is shaking. What am I saying no to?
All of this. It’s too much.
“I… Sorry. Maybe it’s the teacher in me. When it comes to neglected kids, I take it personally. And I can relate, you know? Connor’s parents made him fight for whatever scraps of food or attention he could get. Bex’s would have sold her for drugs if she hadn’t run away. And my mother ditched me for the latest guy she’d met at bible study. Or maybe it was the bar. I forget.Just left town and handed our keys to the landlord, along with my clothes. Which was fine, really, because I had my friends and she’d never been interested in being maternal. She did love falling in love though. She couldn’t stop doing it, no matter how many times it broke her heart. The only one she couldn’t love was me. But I was better off without her.”
