Page 85 of The Second Kiss
I look at him, incredulous. “You miss talking to me?”
“Yeah. If you haven’t noticed, I’m kind of short on friends these days. Lexie made sure everyone at school hates me.” He shakes his head. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to make this about me. But I came out here for the same reason you did—to be alone and to clear my head.”
I shouldn’t talk to him. I should put my other earbud in and keep running, maybe even turn around and go the opposite direction. Instead, I leave it out and find myself matching his stride as we both start off again.
Finally I ask, “What’s going on with you? Why do you need a run?”
“Nothing big. I just thought senior year would be different. More fun, more...I don’t know. Instead it’s a bunch of stress. A bunch of pressure to get the right grades, win the game, bust your butt to get the right scholarship.”
“I heard you got it...the right scholarship. Congratulations,” I say it without an ounce of enthusiasm, but he doesn’t catch the hint.
“I did,” a smile breaks across his face. “Full ride with a few other perks. Except...”
“Except?” I know I shouldn’t let myself be drawn in, but I am.
“Except,” he hesitates, “I’m not sure I want to be that far away from home and from my friends.”
“Didn’t you just say you don’t have any friends?”
“Yeah,” he keeps running, “but I’ll miss my family and maybe a few other people.” He gives me a look that I assume is supposed to be meaningful. “What about you?”
“I’m going to WSU.”
“I bet you have a ton of scholarships.”
“No idea yet. I’m still waiting to hear about the ones I applied for.”
“You’ll get them, all of them. No one is smarter or works harder than you.”
“I don’t know about that.”
“I do. You never give up. I’ve always admired that about you. I don’t have your drive.”
“A full-ride football scholarship isn’t exactly easy to come by.”
He gets serious. “I guess you’re right. Maybe that’s our problem.”
“Our problem?”
“When we want something, neither of us knows when to quit, even if it’s out of our reach. Even if the reaching is killing us.”
He’s right.
My insides are churning with thoughts of how much I’ve fixated on Jacob; how much it hurts to know that I don’t mean anything to him; how stupid I’ve been. And now Brad is throwing it in my face. I pour on the speed, leaving him behind, letting the world blur around me. My breathing gets ragged and my vision blurs. I trip, sprawling on the trail, bits of gravel tearing into my knees and then my palms.
“Jess!” Brad yells. He runs to me and then drops on one knee beside me. “Are you okay?”
Tears spring to my eyes, but I bite them back. “Fine!” I yell at him.
“Let me see.” He bends over to examine my scraped knees and my bleeding hands.
“I said I’m fine.”
“There’s that word again.”
I grit my teeth, “Why can’t you just leave me alone?”
He catches my eye. “That is a really good question."
