Page 43 of The Second Kiss
He lifts his head and smiles. "We had a good run, though, didn't we, Jess?"
"No. If I remember right, that was an excruciatingly hot run."
"I don't mean the actual run. I meant us. You and me."
"Also excruciating."
I wait for his denial. Instead, he nods. "I guess you'd see it that way." He hesitates. "I should never have lost my temper at that party. I should have listened to what you were saying, and not let that little—" He shakes his head. "I know you won't believe me, but I didn't do what you think I did."
"Don't try to deny it!" My temper flares. For a second I forget that I'm stuck alone with him in a secluded spot. "I only drank a couple of sips, and I forced myself to puke as soon as I walked out of the party, but I was still sick and dizzy. Matt thought I was drunk when he came to pick me up. There was definitely something in my drink."
He doesn't answer my rage. Instead, he hangs his head. "I can see why you'd think I did it. I was the one who handed you the water." He looks up, his eyes earnest. "But it wasn't me. That's why I've been trying to get you to talk to me. I need you to know that I wasn't the one who spiked your drink." He closes his eyes. "It was Lexie. She brought drugs to the party. She slipped them into your water while we were talking." He lets out a long breath. "She was jealous. She wanted me for herself. She did it to get between us. I didn't know what she'd done until a few days ago. She got really drunk one night and told me everything. She thought it was a big joke.”
I'm staring at him, trying to decide if I believe him. He looks sincere, repentant, vulnerable, but I know if I can trust him.
"I'm such an idiot for falling for it, for falling for her." He steps closer, and I don't move. "I know things will never be the same between us, but I don't want you to think I'd ever hurt you like that. I was stupid to let you go. Your reaction hurt and embarrassed and confused me at the party. You tore the hell out of my face, and I saw red. I'm sorry about that. And I'm sorry it took me so long to realize that Lexie is a sadistic, manipulative monster with a ton of issues."
A long silence stretches between us as I work to take in what he's saying. Finally, I ask, "Why did she leave?"
He waits for a few heartbeats, like he's debating something with himself. For a second, I don't think he's going to tell me anything. Then it all spills out in a rush. "Like I said, she has issues. The roofies were just the beginning. She's into much harder stuff than that now. Her mom finally forced her into rehab." He shakes his head. "No one else knows where Lexie is. If I say anything, then I'd be breaking the promise I made. Better to let the rumor mill drag me down, right?" He chuckles a mirthless laugh. "You'd know about that one too, huh? In case you didn’t already guess, Lexie started the rumors about you. When she found out I played paintball at your house, she got insanely jealous. She told your counselor that crazy story about an abusive boyfriend and that he was the reason you broke your wrist. I went in and cleared that one up after you left school that day."
“I didn’t... I don’t...” but I don’t know what to say to him, or how to begin to believe him.
He looks at me with a sad smile. "Your boyfriend from base seems like a good guy. I'm glad. You deserve someone special."
"Thanks, but I..." I stop myself from telling him Jacob isn't my boyfriend. Even if everything he said is true, he's right; there's no way for us to go back to the way things were. I’m not sure I’d ever want to go back.
He moves toward me again, but doesn't get close enough to touch me. Instead, he steps out from under the bridge. He turns his face toward the rain. "I think it's slowed down, at least for a few minutes. I’m going to make a run for it. Can I give you a ride back to your car?"
I shake my head. "I'll be fine."
"Right." He reaches as if he's going to touch my shoulder, but lets his hand drop. "Be careful, Jess. Like I said. It's not safe for a girl to be out here running alone."
twenty-one
Unnecessary Roughness
“Jess, get up; we’re going to play football.”
I look around groggily. It’s my brother Matt. He’s standing in the doorway with a big grin on his face. I glance out the window at the pouring rain and pull the pillow over my head. “What are you so happy about?”
“Turkey Bowl! We’re going to play football.” Matt gets overly excited and overly competitive about the annual Thanksgiving football game he always plays in with his friends.
"No.Youare going to play football,” I say from under the pillow. “I’m going back to sleep.”
The room gets quiet. For a blissful moment, I think he's gone. Then he pulls the pillow off my face. "C'mon Jess. We need one more to make the teams even."
I roll over. "What happened to, ‘the Turkey Bowl is a sacred male-only ritual, no girls allowed?’" I'm throwing the exact words he used on me last year back in his face. "Is Kendra playing, and you don't want her to be the only girl?"
"No way. Those guys play rough. I don't want her to get hurt," Matt says.
I raise my eyebrows at him. "But it's okay if your little sister gets crushed?" I wave my wrist in his face. "I just got my cast off last week. Ask Tyler to go."
"Tyler is coming too." Matt sits on the edge of my bed, coaxing, "C’mon Jess. There's someone coming who might get you to change your mind."
I sit up suddenly wide awake with just one thought.Jacob is back."Okay, I'll come." I try to mask my excitement by yawning and trying to sound tired. "But you owe me."
"Maybe after today, you'll owe me." He grins as he stands up. "You have five minutes."
