Page 66 of Second Act
“Hell if I know.”
“Well, I know it’s more than you’re letting on. Talk to me. I’m your best friend.” Gavin paused a moment. “Possibly your only friend.”
Hugh barked out a laugh. “Don’t flatter yourself.” But he found he wanted to talk about Jess. “She told me why she broke our engagement. Well, actually, I pressured her into it.” He wasn’t going to cut himself any slack.
“Something about how she hated being in the public eye all the time.”
“That was my spin on it. She didn’t enjoy the spotlight, but I was the one who made her feel uncomfortable about how well she handled it.” He shook his head. “She decided that she was holding me back from my lofty goal of being a movie star. The woman who’s saved countless animals’ lives believed she would be an impediment to my career. God, I was such an idiot.”
“No argument here,” Gavin said. “However, it sounds to me like there’s a fine line between what you believe and the explanation she gave you.”
“Ah, it’s subtle but significant. My theory assumed that she was thinking only of herself, but that’s not Jess. She would have sucked it up and done what was necessary because she was always there to supportme. I was such an ass about it that I convinced her she wasn’t good enough at the publicity appearances. She didn’t want to be the reason I didn’t make it as an actor, so she took herself out of the equation.”
Gavin stood up to refill his glass from the cut-crystal decanter. He tilted it toward Hugh. “Want another?”
“Why not? You serve damned good scotch.” Hugh held out his glass for Gavin to pour more of the golden liquor into.
“So how does this revelation change things?” Gavin eased back into his chair.
Hugh had been trying to figure that out ever since Jess told him. “There’s a lot of damage. In my mind, she abandoned me, so I abandoned her. She called me. I didn’t return her messages. She even sent me a very handsome and expensive gift whenLevel Bestpremiered. I still have it, but I never thanked her.”
“In short, you behaved like a real bastard.”
“I behaved like I was still a teenage foster child, not a grown man. I understand that now. But then...she hit every hot button in my brain.” He swirled his glass so the liquid formed a whirlpool. “It was like watching my mother walk away from the foster home all over again.”
Gavin was silent, a rare occurrence. Hugh looked up to find the usually harsh angles of his friend’s face gone soft with compassion.
“Don’t you do it, too,” Hugh said, an edge in his voice. “I don’t want pity.”
“It’s empathy. I was also deserted by my mother.” Gavin’s tone was even. “It leaves scars that never quite heal.”
Hugh nodded in acknowledgment of their shared experience.
“Jessica told you you’d already repaired some of the damage, so the case is not hopeless,” Gavin said. “Which brings me back to the question I asked you the last time we discussed this: What do you want from Jessica?”
Hugh put his feet on the floor and stood up to walk to his favorite window. “I don’t think I ever stopped loving her.” He faced Gavinsquarely. “I want her to love me again. I want to build a better relationship this time. I want it to last.”
“That’s definitive. How are you going to make it happen?”
“She’s not indifferent to me,” Hugh said, remembering their evening at the theater.
Gavin chuckled. “I won’t ask how you know that. I can see it on your face. But that’s not enough.”
“It’s a start. With Jess, there have to be emotions involved,” he said. “I need to charm a grumpy animal welfare inspector tomorrow. That will earn me brownie points.”
“All that indirect trust building is great as far as it goes, but you have to put your heart right out there for her to stomp on if she chooses to. You have to tell her exactly how you feel. I learned that lesson the hard way.”
Hugh shook his head. “There’s still too much about our past we need to resolve. She’s not ready to hear how I feel yet.”
“Or maybe you’re just too afraid to tell her.”
