Page 100 of Take 2
I sigh. “Sex is one thing I miss about human interaction.”
James presses his lips together. “I had sex with masks on once.”
“Oh, honey!”
“It was fine.” He waves his hand in front of my face. “Pretend you didn’t hear that. Lane change. Pictures?”
“Pictures! Can we do some chugging from the bottle pics this year?”
“It wouldn’t be believable if there weren’t some of those.”
We also do masked pictures, drinking with masks pulled out of the way pictures, and one where we are Lysol wiping the bottle. Have we lost our minds? Absolutely. But literally everyone has, so bottoms up!
“There is no way you’re still too busy to post your own Instagram pictures.”
The signatureswooshtone sounds, and I put my phone away. “I have beenso busy.First of all, I watched seventy percent of Netflix. Secondly, I need to keep Ashleigh employed. It is my duty in these trying times not to add her name to the unemployment lists, and I love her. She issointo my work. Supportive, and excited, and—”
“And if another assistant quits to work for someone you hate you’ll die?”
I bob my head in a mocking way and pop my lips. “There isn’t really anyone else I hate who could steal Ashleigh anyway, but … there’s that.”
“She does seem lovely.”
“So lovely.”
“I can’t wait until we get to meet her in person,” James says.
“Right!”
Truth be told, I have been busy, though I’ve also watched a shit-ton of TV. Somehow, my movie is still being made from people’s homes and apartments and Zoom meetings and madness, but I supposedly have a movie coming out later this year. I’m not really sure how that’s going, and it hurts my anxious perfectionist side, but honestly, that side has had to take a few Xanax and nap for the past year.
“Remember when we thought no hosts two years ago was going to be the weirdest Oscars ever?” James’ feet are next to mine on the ottoman. I wore heels for the pictures, but that was more than enough; it’ll take a while to get my feet used to real shoes again.
My laugh is entirely too joyful for the situation—further proof that we’ve cracked. “Ah, we were so naive.”
“Do you remember … the before time?”
I sip my champagne and stare into the middle distance. “Vaguely. There were places where people would make us cocktails.”
“And sketchy men would hit on us.”
“I hated it then, but oh, how I miss sketchy men hitting on me.” Although it seems like that stopped well before the world shut down. Holing up to work like a hermit was fine until Ihad to.
“Same. And I envy my past self that never tasted your attempt at homemade bread.”
I nod. “I miss the little bit of space I had in my kitchen before I bought all of those baking supplies I’ll never use.”
“The stand mixer came in handy.” He points with his foot to the metal bowl on the ottoman, which is currently being used as an ice bucket for the champagne.
“True. And I got Tabitha Paige out of all this.”
He laughs into his flute. “I will never not make fun of you for: one, getting a plague pet, and two, naming her TP.”
“I love her!”
“Where is she?”
“I don’t know. I think there’s some kind of portal under my bed that transports her to a magical land. She’s as elusive as her namesake was.”
