Page 96 of The Twelve Dates of Christmas
Laura opened and closed her mouth like a hooked fish.
“For how long?” she asked.
“I don’t know exactly,” said Kate. “A while, I think. Maybe always? Or maybe not. I don’t really know. It’s been coming on slowly for a long time.”
“Like black ceiling mold,” said Laura.
Kate nodded. “And equally hard to get rid of,” she said.
“And you didn’t tell me?” Laura was affronted.
“There was nothing to tell!” said Kate. “I didn’t truly know myself until last night, and then this morning he brought me a gingerbread mocha...”
“Wow,” said Laura. “You really are easy, aren’t you. Ever thought about holding out for something a bit more substantial, diamonds maybe?”
“Obviously it wasn’t only the mocha,” said Kate.
“Glad to hear it,” said Laura.
“There was a bacon sandwich too,” said Kate.
“Slapper,” said Laura.
Kate laughed and then covered her face with her hands.
“Oh God!” she moaned. “Why him?”
“What are you going to do about it?” Laura asked.
“Nothing,” said Kate. “What can I do? He’s with Sarah and I wouldn’t want to ruin that and I wouldn’t want to ruin our friendship either.”
Laura looked hard at her friend.
“Are you sure,” said Laura, “that this isn’t you self-sabotaging again? You know what you’re like. A good thing comes along and you pick holes in it until it falls apart. You’re on the cusp of something potentially serious with Richard and suddenly you’re in love with Matt.”
“Not suddenly,” said Kate. “It doesn’t feel sudden. I mean, it hit me suddenly, but then when I thought about it, it’s like it’s always been there, only I couldn’t see it, like I’ve been wearing blinders and now I’ve taken them off and I can see that I do actually and truly love him.”
“Bloody hell,” said Laura. “You mean it, don’t you? You really are in love with Matt.”
Laura stumbled back into an armchair.
“Bloody hell,” she said again.
“Yeah,” said Kate.
“Matt?” said Laura. “Are you sure? I’ve got to be honest, this is grossing me out a bit.”
“Oh,” said Kate. “My apologies. I’m sorry my heartfelt confession has turned your stomach.”
“Well, it’s a bit of a shock.”
“It kind of snuck up on me too,” said Kate.
“You can’t ignore this,” Laura told her.
“I don’t have a choice. I shall throw myself into this relationship with Richard. Who knows? Maybe it’ll work out.”
“It’s not going to work out if you’re in love with someone else!” said Laura.
