Page 27 of The Twelve Dates of Christmas
“If I only wanted sex, I wouldn’t have paid out all this money to Lightning Strikes!”
“How much is high-class man-hooker?” Laura asked.
Kate ignored her.
“So who’s next?” Laura asked.
“Next is Sam,” said Kate. “Sam is thirty-eight and a motorcycle enthusiast.”
Laura pulled a face.
“Please tell me you won’t get on the back of his motorbike,” she said. “You can barely control a bicycle. At no point should you ever try to ride a bike with an engine.”
“Don’t worry.” Kate laughed. “I know my limitations.”
The sound of smashing crockery from behind the counter caused the entire café to raise their arms in unison and cheer. Matt took a bow and the regulars went back to their noisy conversations.
“What else?” asked Laura. Mina was still cheering, and Charley copied.
“He’s a graphic designer,” said Kate.
“Tick!” said Laura, making the gesture in the air.
“He says in his profile he’d like children.”
“Tick!” said Laura again.
“And he’s passionate about conservation,” said Kate.
Laura clutched at her heart.
“Oh, perfect! Perfect!” exclaimed Laura. “Picture, please.”
Kate flicked to the photograph of Sam and handed the phone to Laura. His hair was closely shaved, mostly blond with a spattering of white at the sides. His clean-shaven, angular face came to a chiseled chin and his eyes crinkled at the edges where he was smiling.
“Oh, ding-dong,” said Laura. “Surely this is game over. He is beautiful.”
“Isn’t he?” agreed Kate.
Charley’s eyes were beginning a slow droop that even Mina’s lively commentary couldn’t remedy. Sensing that she’d lost her audience, she squeezed past the pushchair and toddled off up the café in her tutu and wellies.
She walked over to Matt, who had just set down a tray of cakes for a table of six eagle-eyed customers, and put her arms out to him. Matt picked her up and began to make a fuss over her. Mina squeezed his cheeks and made him laugh.
“Looks like Matt’s found his intellectual equal,” said Kate.
“Don’t be so rude,” said Laura. “Mina is way more intelligent than Matt.”
Matt strode over to the sofa. Mina sat contentedly on his hip licking the icing off a cupcake.
“Oh, thank you so much,” Laura said with daggers in her eyes. “You gave my overactive daughter more sugar. You must have known how little I like sleep.”
Matt smiled.
“It’s in theGood Godparents Handbook,” he said. “Besides,” he went on, “it’s all nonsense, isn’t it? It never did me any harm.”
He crossed his eyes and smiled goofily at Kate and Laura, letting his tongue loll out of the corner of his mouth.
“I will set birds on you,” said Laura. “I will find some and I will set them upon you.”
