Page 17 of A Queen Of Broken Realms
“If I could sense her presence even a little, then yes, with the right materials. But I’m getting nothing.”
The witch’s answer sparks the frustration and rage that swirls within me. Smoke and embers drop to my feet and coat the stone. The witch turns toward me and I force myself to remember that she loves Lu with a depth that matches my own. Exceeds it. And she might be my only hope.
“Do you have any texts related to my kind?” she asks, her eyes darting to the vaporous wings unfurling behind me. “Spells? Maybe there’s an ancient incantation I can find that could help locate the pendant.”
“Yes,” I say, but my mind is already pulled into the past. The memory of walking Lu to the library the first time she came to the Shadow Realm strikes my heart with the impact of a sword. The tears she tried to hide. Her notes.You are a monster, she’d written. One of so many jokes. She never said as much, but I knew it was her game, trying to make me laugh, no matter how hard I tried not to. And I put up a good fight, only to see what more she would bring.
“…Reaper?”
I blink at the witch, both relieved and annoyed to be wrenched from memory. “Cyrus. He will take you to the library. He will show you where to look.”
“And you? What are you going to do?”
I look at the witch for just a moment, unable to lay my gaze on the pain and loss in her face for any longer than a heartbeat. My only answer is to turn away, to start back down the path toward the decaying house that was meant to be ours.
Lu was right, though she would never believe it.
I am a monster. And I will rip the realms apart until I find her.
CHAPTER7
ASHEN
It’s been five days.
Five days with no sign, no feeling, no whispering sense of my Lu.
I stand in front of the mirror and look at the mated mark on my chest. I worry about the lines. Are they becoming blurry? Is the gold becoming dull? The black becoming grey? Sometimes an hour passes just looking at the lion mace, wondering why this world tears everything good from my grasp.
And wondering how I will punish it back.
My gaze roams from the mark to my eyes. Dark crescents inhabit the flesh beneath them. Red rings circle my irises. It’s the sleeplessness, the stress of the panic that never abates. And it’s the bitter helplessness. I don’t even know where to look. Where to start. In the sea? How do I search an endless ocean of decaying souls for the one light to ever grace its depths? It would consume her. It would hide her and never give her back.
But it doesn’t stop me from trying.
Every day I search from the cliffs. Every night I wade into the anguish of hell, swimming parallel to the shore, searching for anything that might tell me where she is.
Nothing. Nothing comes.
“Are you ready?” a voice calls from the living room. I grind my molars, trying to quell the irritation of having to do anything that takes my focus from my omnipresent distress or my drive to find her.
My only reply is to leave the bathroom. I enter the living room as I button my shirt, my fingers touching the mark as I close the fabric over my heart. Cole and Ediye stand waiting in the opulent room of the quarters we’ve commandeered from one of the slain Council members.
I take my sword and my bag and glance to where Lu’skatanalies resting on a table in the corner of the room. There are reminders of her everywhere, even in places she’s never been. They cause the dread and darkness to churn within me, but I cannot stop myself from seeking them out.
“Let’s go, Reaper,” the witch says, pulling my eyes from Lu’s weapon. Ediye’s voice is like gravel from lack of sleep. She doesn’t show it as much, but she is just as weary and heartsick as I am. She squeezes Cole’s hand, and he presses a kiss to her bare shoulder before she pulls on her jacket. I turn away from watching the simple comfort of a touch. Even my skin aches for Lu, as though it’s starved by her absence.
The witch and I leave the Shadow Realm to the care of Cole and Cyrus and the soldiers who keep the rest of the demons under fierce supervision. In these last few days, I have taken great pains to weed out the disloyal among them. The deaths I have dealt have been brutal and unforgiving. Rumor spread quickly that none would be spared. And so, the realm has been quiet. For now. Even still, I refuse to leave for more than a few hours at most. The fear that Lu will appear while I’m away or that I could miss feeling anything that will tell me where to look is too much weight to bear.
But this has to be done.
We arrive at a corridor near the town of Bran and then portal through Ediye’s power to the coven across the mountain from Valentina’s estate. It’s much like Valentina’s home, a fortified, small castle where several family groups of witches carve out a comfortable, remote existence. They stay hidden in the snow-capped stone structures, not coming out to greet the Reaper in their midst.
The others are waiting outside for our arrival.
Eryx radiates light when he sees Ediye, folding her into a long embrace, his wings shielding their kiss from my view. Valentina watches me with concern, as though she doesn’t trust my hold over my sanity. Probably wise. Davina drifts into view and I cut my gaze away from her as cinders burn in my eyes. Eryx and Ediye separate, the witch running her knuckles beneath her lashes to swipe away any tears before they fall.
The small group turns their attention to me as I lay my bag on the snow and roll up my sleeve. I loathe the pitying looks they give me. Their empathy is wasted. I don’t want kindness. I want answers. I want Lu.
