Page 108 of Wandering in Darkness
“I’m going to see what else we can get out of Audrey. I think we need to get moving too. There’s the possibility that Lt. Allen knows we’re here and if he does, I don’t want him paying us a visit,” Grayson says. “Antonio, Felix, can you two go get the SUV so we can leave? Tell Ned’s people to get out of here and stay out of it.”
Antonio nods. “Of course.”
“I’m never getting in a vehicle with him again,” Lane vows, looking more than a little nauseous. I’m honestly not sure whether seeing what’s happening or not seeing it is worse whenit comes to Antonio’s driving. Lane’s expression tells me it’s probably worse not to be able to see it.
NINETEEN
CAL
Lane takes Copper and has him follow us, looking like he might be a bit carsick but pretending he’s not so he doesn’t break his “cool guy” routine.
When we reach the room where we’d left Audrey and Thomas, Ned thankfully has a handle on things.
“The rest of my people, are they okay?” he asks, sounding anxious.
“They are. We’ve told them to get out of here. It’s not safe,” Grayson explains.
I can feel Ned’s relief when these words reach him. “Thank god. I was… I never should have pulled anyone into this. I never should have risked anyone’s life but my own. It was foolish and I… I thought I could make him pay for her death.”
“Let’s talk about it in the SUV. You can go with us. Audrey, you’re coming too,” Grayson decides as he grabs her bound hands and starts dragging her toward the door. She willingly follows him out to where the SUV pulls up. We load everyoneinto it, which is a tight fit, especially when the pig bulldozes his way to where my feet should go before they’re rudely shoved out of the way as the pig lies down flat.
I now have to rest my feet on Brigs, which gets glares out of Felix like he thinks I should hold my legs up in the air while his pig lives in comfort.
“Ned, what do you have for us?” I ask while Antonio drives, much to Lane’s horror, although he’s back to being a model citizen as he heads away from the marijuana farm.
“How are you all involved?” he asks, so Grayson catches him up on what’s going on and why Grayson joined him, including using an alias in case his name got back to Lt. Allen.
Ned sighs, sounding mentally and physically exhausted. His injuries aren’t severe, but one eye is swollen shut and he’s bloody and bruised. “I worked with Leonard—Lt. Allen—here and there for years before I started to notice strange occurrences, which led to where we are today. Things like military vehicles missing after hours without being checked out before returning by the next morning. Transports going from different locations than we were originally told. So I began monitoring it and soon realized that someone was using military resources for their own gain.
“I made the mistake of raising this concern with Leonard. He was a higher-up I put a lot of trust and faith in. I didn’t know anything about it at that point. I simply raised a concern I had… and then all of a sudden, I was facing a darkness I had no idea how to get through. Suddenly, I was notified thatIwas the one suspected of being involved in illegal activity. That was their excuse—‘illegal activity’—but I know they found out about my father’s farm and were planning on using it to get me arrested if I spoke a word. My term was coming to an end, and they told me to willingly leave or they would make sure I left.
“And that’s when I made the mistake of trying to be defiant—a mistake that ruined my life. They took my fiancée Pamela…they sent me pictures every day of what they were doing to her with the threat of killing her if I didn’t listen. So I did everything they said. I was prepared to leave, I was quiet. I stopped looking into anything and turned away from it all… but I guess my telling a friend about it before they took Pamela is what sealed her fate.
“Unbeknownst to me, my friend tried to dig into things himself, resulting in his death. But it got back to Leonard thatIwas the one who told him. And in response… you know Pamela’s fate. They killed her because I didn’t listen. After that, I felt like I had nothing else to lose. He ruined my life. He destroyed every ounce of it, so why couldn’t I destroy his even if it cost my own life? Well, you see where that’s gotten me. It turned me into a man willing to sacrifice others to gain something.” He looks remorseful as he turns to Antonio. “I don’t want to be a monster.”
“We all make horrible choices when we’re pushed to that point,” I say. “If I could rewind time, I would do so much to save myself this pain, but we can’t. We have to keep moving forward. And right now, I feel like we both need the same thing to keep moving.”
“Sounds like it.”
“So your plan before was to try to draw my family in?” Antonio asks. “You thought my family would just… wipe them out?”
“The marijuana business isn’t mine, it’s my father’s, but after being in this line of work so long, he got to know those who were deeper in the business and actually held some control. We just supply others with marijuana, whereas your family has an entire empire. So yes, I thought that if your mother or brother got notified that you were with Leonard, they would tear him apart to get you back.”
Ned swipes at his eyes. “Fuck,” he mutters. “When I was young, I decided this business wasn’t for me, and that’s when Iwent into the military… instead, I should have stayed here with my high school sweetheart. I should have stayed… and she’d still be alive.”
“We can’t change the past,” I say, knowing I’ve wished for it so many times.
Grayson reaches over and sets his hand on mine, gently squeezing it. I flip my hand over so I can cup his, and I feel his fingers tightly wrap around mine. It gives me comfort I didn’t know I could feel from a simple touch.
“I know,” Ned says. “But I can still regret it.”
And I understand that far too well.
“Audrey, it’s your turn. What excuse do you have for yourself?” Grayson asks. “Because of your lies and deceit, so many lives have been destroyed. Clearly, you don’t care.”
She looks over at us from where she’s bound and sitting on the floor, given little room with the two dogs, pig, and multiple people. “You think I should have ended up like you two? Cal, you’re over there with a part of yourself missing that makes it hard for you to even function. Or do you want me like Ned, with people I love torn apart and killed? You think I should have dealt with that?”
“But did you do it to protect someone? Because if you did, you sure haven’t mentioned that,” I say. “You can’t convince us you did no wrong if you’ve done nothing to prove it.”
