Page 44 of Sliding Into Love
Ivy ducked her head, letting her hair fall forward to hide her face.
“Wow. Okay. I guess you shared, so it’s my turn now.” A long exhale sent tendrils of hair flying. “Ilovetrying new foods. It’s my favorite. I told you about the group home. It… wasn’t great. It was too full, and sometimes…” She paused again, longer. Her eyes went glassy, probably getting lost in old, painful memories. “Most of the time, it was okay. We didn’t get much variety, definitely nothing special.” The tip of her finger rested on the glossy green bakery box. Another deep exhale. “Sometimes there wasn’t enough for all of us, so some nights I just didn’t go home. Someone at school figured out I was living in the locker room and library and reported me. They labeled me as ‘troubled’. I never did drugs or slept around, but I can see why some of the others did. Taking control of your life the only way you can, you know?”
Ethan could relate to that, taking control in whatever minuscule ways you could when everything else was in someone else’s hands. “Yeah. I get that.”
“I was almost sent to a halfway house for juvenile delinquents, but a spot opened up in another foster home, with a lady who had a good track record with ‘troubled kids’.” Ivy paused, letting out a sardonic bark of a laugh. But then she gave a real smile, erasing some of the sadness in her eyes. “Maya. She was sodifferent. So amazing. The day she picked me up, she handed me a backpack full of little things. Things you wouldn’t think twice of unless you’d never had them. And I hadn’t. She gave me snacks, like Oreos and chips, and she made sure I knew they were for me.Only for me.” Her voice wobbled. “A pack of gum, toiletries with nice scents, not just bars of the cheapest soap at the supermarket. And tampons.” Ivy paused again, meeting his eyes and smiling. Ethan remembered the day they’d met when her bag had spilled. Her story explained so much about her, and it sent a pang through him how much she’d struggled at such a young age. “So, anyway, Maya picked me up, let me choose a restaurant, and told me to eat whatever I wanted. I was so nervous and excited, I just pointed at the menu, and it ended up being ham and pineapple pizza. Maya gave me the same horrified look you’re giving me now. But she let me get it anyway and brought me home. I still get it sometimes, just to remember.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know. About any of it.”
Tears turned her eyes silvery again, but at least they didn’t fall. Ethan didn’t think he could bear it if she cried again.
“Of course, you didn’t.” Ivy’s smile was watery. “It’s okay, now. It was a long time ago.”
“Still. I wish there was something I could do. Kids don’t deserve that.” His hands clenched around the box he held, crushing the cardboard with a loud crunch.
“Oh!” She gave a little cry, her body jerking back.
Shit, he’d scared her.
“Ivy, I’m sorry. Maybe we should go.” He began to close the box and gather their forks, but her hand on his stopped him.
“Okay, we can go if you want. But why?” She looked concerned and…sad?
“I can’t do this,” and it sounded anguished, even to him. “I can’t not be angry over what happened to you, and to your kids. I can’t fix it, and I scared you, and I’m sorry. So, if you want to go, I understand.”
“It’s not your fault.” Her voice was gentle.
“But I still wish I could help.”
“No. Ethan, what happened toyouisn’t your fault.”
Inside, Ethan was reeling, but he tried to keep his face neutral. He’d never considered that before, but after a moment’s consideration, he realized she wasright.
“Ethan.” Her voice was even. “Look at me.” He hadn’t heard her be commanding before, and his eyes snapped to hers. “What happened, happened. I learned from the past, and I moved on. And I’m here with you, now. You can move on, too.” Ivy stared intently into his face. She squeezed his hands in emphasis, sliding her fingers between his.
She was right.
He needed to let the past die.
“I’m sorry,” he said again.
“Ethan, it’sokay. I’m okay. Now, will you eat this with me?” She held up her fork with a bite of the fluffy-looking dessert in front of his face.
They ate more of the desserts and talked about college. She told him how she’d graduated from Central University and had then gone on to complete a master’s degree in biology last December. She explained more about the job she’d told him about, telling him how worried she was, and what would happen if she didn’t get it.
“I keep checking my email, waiting for the update that must not be coming.” When she reached into her pocket and came up empty, the delicate arches of her brows pinched together, forming a crease in the center of her forehead.
Ethan wished there was some way he could help, but what could he do short of paying off the board? He had a feeling she’d hate that solution.
“Anyway.” She pointed her fork at the box. A single truffle remained. “You have it,” Ivy said. “I probably ate more than you, anyway.”
Ethan broke the truffle in half and held it out to her, expecting her to take it from his hand.
Instead, she leaned forward and let him place it in her mouth, her lips barely brushing his fingertips, and then she moaned, keeping full eye contact. She arched an eyebrow at him and smiled when she’d finished the chocolate, the pink tip of her tongue flicking out to lick her lips. Ethan’s blood turned to fire in his veins.
“Will you be okay if we walk more? It’s so pretty with the lights on the water.”
The fairy lights strung on either side of the river sparkled on its surface and made her skin glow.
