Page 175 of Caught in the Crossfire
I cried against his chest. He wouldn’t let me bury it anymore. None of them would. They were here despite everything, crowding around me on the floor of the gym, ready to listen.
It terrified me.
“What if it changes what you think of me?”
“Never,” Ryu said, grabbing my hand. “It would never change what we think about you.”
I choked back a cry. “What if it makes me afraid of facing them again?”
“It won’t,” Ciel answered. “But if it does, that’s why we’re here.”
“What if I can’t be the queen I want to be because I’m so afraid?” I whispered.
Obi pressed a large hand against my back. “I will teach you how to find courage again.”
I swallowed. “What if admitting I was hurt is admitting it was my fault?”
Wynn pressed close and drew his fingertips down my scar. “What happened to you wasnotyour fault.”
I sobbed in their arms. A weight started loosening from my chest.
If I couldn’t open myself up to them, then what was I doing?
I sniffled and wiped my nose. “Okay.”
56
LEONA
“You’ll tell us what happened?” Cas asked.
I nodded. My hands wrapped around my arms to ward off the chill creeping into my bones.
“Do you want to go upstairs? Get more comfortable?” He moved, but I shook my head and clung to him.
“No. If I move, I’ll shatter to pieces.”
“I’ll be there to help put you back together again. I always will be.” He grabbed my left hand. “That’s what this ring means.” He placed my palm over his heart. “That’s what love means.”
Everyone crowded close, ready to listen. Ready to catch me as I fell.
I took a shaky breath and closed my eyes, finally allowing the memories to wash over me. My hands began to shake, but he gripped them tightly.
“They put me in a cell with Max,” I began. I told them about how, when I first saw him, I thought he had captured me, but he was bound in ropes the same way I was. He was injured, and he seemed really surprised to see me.
“At first, we were resistant to our captors. They talked down to me, but I fought back,” I said. Telling the story out loud put meright back in it. “I imagined what Ryu would do, and I knew he’d fight, so I fought. Max and I killed one of them.”
“My vicious girl,” Ryu whispered, voice tight. “Keep going.”
I swallowed while pressing my lips together, trying to hold it together. “That’s when they retaliated. The leader—I called him Buzz Cut in my head—said they couldn’t kill me. They were taking me back to Albania as payment for the money they lost since my father’s death.”
“What next?” Obi asked.
“Buzz Cut beat me instead of killing me.” Nausea turned my stomach. “He slammed me down, kicked me over and over. He pinned me to the ground and threatened to rape me. I fought back, and I knew I shouldn’t have, but I just couldn’t let him keep hurting me.”
I could feel his hands on me. There were phantom snakes slithering over my skin. My skin prickled with goosebumps.
“He took us down to the cargo hold, where they had the other women,” I whispered. My vision went blurry, and I curled inward. “He picked one that looked a little like me. She had the same hair. He raped her, and he forced us both to watch. He told us he couldn’t kill me, but every time I resisted, he’d take it out on her instead.”
