Page 134 of Only Fools Rush
She looked over her shoulder at me, and her smile quickly faded. “Yes?”
“May I speak with you a moment?”
I waited with bated breath as she considered me for a moment before nodding. Ever since Kofler’s death, it had been difficult for me to face her. I could see my darkness reflected in her, and I still had not reconciled how I felt about that.
I may chastise Ryu for his avoidance, and use it to my advantage, but that did not mean I was unaware of my own emotional hesitancies.
However, ignoring her would not get either of us closer to achieving what we wanted.
She crossed her arms over her chest. “What is it?”
“I…” My mouth opened and closed as the words died on my lips. What was I doing? “Ryuji and I are going to China to take care of the contract there,” I said, stepping back. She already knew that the contract had been requested of us and what it meant to secure those shipping routes. “We will be gone two days.”
“Wait, what?” Her arms dropped as confusion caused a frown. “You’re leaving?”
“It won’t take long,” I said. “We will return before the meeting with Giulio.”
She went to say something, but at the last second, she shook her head. “Okay. Be safe.”
“I’m sorry I’ve been distant since Los Angeles,” I started. I rubbed my beard. I stepped forward and leaned closer. There was no other explanation I could give her, but I did need her to trust me. To listen to my instruction.
“It’s fine.” She softened, looking up at me through her eyelashes.
One of her curls was caught folded at a weird angle by her temple. I freed it and tucked it behind her ear. Her eyes widened.
I cleared my throat. “I promised to teach you what I know about the underworld, and this is the next lesson. If the opportunity arises where you can secure an army, you have to take it.”
She pulled back, tilting her head to the side. “What are you talking about?”
“If you are going to be a queen, you must make strategic decisions that further your goals. You must be willing to sacrifice in order to make strategic gain.”
I’d sacrificed my life with my family to afford them the safety they deserved. She had to learn the same.
“Okay…” Her frown deepened. She watched me carefully, eyes flicking across my face. “Tell me what you’re talking about.”
She was not ready. She would reject what needed to happen if she knew now. But she could learn. She could grow. I could plant the seed, and when the time came, I had faith she would embrace it. I was not going to jeopardize our future by letting her make decisions steeped in emotions rather than logic.
So instead of answering her, I gathered her in my arms. She froze, but I didn’t let go. Instead, I breathed her in. I squeezed her tighter against my chest.
After a few moments, her arms wrapped around my neck, and she squeezed back. That unwelcome knot that always seemed to settle in my chest whenever she was near gradually lessened. At the same time, the speed of my heart increased. It echoed in my ears.
“You’re distracting me. I know that’s what you’re doing,” she whispered against my neck.
I laughed softly. She had a way of slicing right through my defenses. The rift between us shortened ever so slightly. Stubbornly, she kept pushing across the no-man’s-land I’d erected between us. It was working.
“Trust me,” I murmured. “Think about what I said. I need you to know that if Ryu and I are gone, we still trust you to make the right decision for all of us.”
I would do everything in my power to bring our goals to fruition—even if that meant using her engagement to secure the forces we needed.
She pulled back to search my face. I loosened my grip on her. One of her hands pressed against the fabric of my shirt, right over my heart, before she let go, and broke the hug. But before she could completely disentangle herself from my arms, my body moved on its own.
I found myself pressing a brief kiss to her cheek.
I didn’t realize what I was doing until my lips had left her soft skin.
Her eyes went wide, sparking that beautiful golden-brown. “Obi…”
Would it be so bad? To give in to the desire to mark her as mine?
