Page 9 of One for the Road
“My boyfriend’s picking me up!” she answers, sounding the most chipper she’s been all night. “We just moved in together, actually. It’s only a few blocks over, but he works late too, so I don’t have to walk alone.”
“That’s good,” I reply as we step out onto Avenue Mont Royal so I can lock up. “My boyfriend is meeting me too. We’re lucky girls,hein?”
“Yeah, we are.” Now she’s got a dopey, lovesick grin on her face. “Nick is amazing. Do you and your boyfriend share a place?”
“We moved in together last week.”
“Oh, you too! That’s exciting!”
Itisexciting. I know everyone thinks I’m crazy for jumping from guy to guy all the time, and even I can admit that living with X so soon is a little insane, but sometimes things just fall into place like that. Yeah, it might not work out. In fact, it probably won’t. Nothing like this has ever actually worked out for me before, but what’s the alternative?
Loneliness. Being alone. It’s the one thing we all fear, and with good reason.
So I don’t stay alone for long. I find someone to hold me at night, someone to wake up beside in the morning, and maybe they aren’t perfect for me, but they’re there. Right now, that person is X.
And right now, he isn’t answering his text messages.
I say goodbye to cutie pie trainee after she introduces me to her cutie pie boyfriend, forcing a smile when they both ask if I’m okay to wait on my own. It’s well past midnight now. X was supposed to be here by 11:30. I watch the two of them walk away holding hands and then send another text.
There aren’t too many people out on the street. We’re right on the edge of Avenue Mont-Royal’s busiest section, but the closest place that’s still open is one block over. Everything else is dark, just a few streetlights shining on the closed-up shop windows. I start twisting mygrand-mère’s ring around my finger as I wait, the one she gave just before she died. I never take it off, not even when I’m working and it gets in the way.
A group of guys in matching jerseys walk by on the other side of the road, swearing and laughing while they push each other around. One looks over at me and whistles. Another one says something I don’t catch that makes them all laugh even harder.
I look down at my feet until they keep walking.
Mauditwolves.
I give up on X and speed-walk the whole way home, making my way closer to downtown and then turning up towards his shitty apartment by Laurier Station. It’s not even a bad part of town; he just lives in a dump of a building.
By the time I’m trudging up the stairs to the second floor, my shoulders are hunched up almost to my ears and my hands are clenched at my sides. Every little sound in the street made me jump. I’m okay to walk alone every now and then, but I thought X was coming, so I didn’t prepare myself for it. Now I’m all tight with nerves and howben furieuseI am at him for putting me through that. We may not have known each other long, and I haven’t told him anything about what happened to Clém, but he knows having a plan for getting home is important to me.
He’s already passed out on the mattress on the floor that we keep using instead of buying a bed frame. I could wake him up and go off on him, but I don’t. Instead I wash my makeup off, strip out of my clothes in the dark bedroom before throwing them over a chair, and crawl in next to him. He curls around me in his sleep and throws an arm over my body. I wiggle in closer beside him and force the corners of my mouth to turn up into a smile.
Three
Zach
PONY: slang term for one fluid ounce of liquor
“Hey, Paige!”
I knock on my roommate’s door for the fifth time. There’s still no sound of movement on the other side. I know she’s got her headphones on; she’salwaysgot her headphones on. Usually I appreciate the fact that she plays loud music for a living and still manages to be very considerate about noise at home, but it does make the rare occasions I need to get her attention kind of awkward.
I give up after another round of knocking and pull my phone out of my pocket to shoot her a text. Thirty seconds later, the door swings open, and there stands Paige, state of the art headphones slung around her neck and wearing a giant black hoodie that goes down to her knees over a pair of black leggings. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her wear a shirt that’s less than three sizes too big.
“Hey,” she greets me in her usual ‘the world and everyone in it is dead to me’ tone. “What’s up?”
“Uh, not much. Just wondering if you’re okay to get all your stuff over to the bar tonight for the April Showers show. I’m heading over in a few hours.”
She shakes her head. “I’m good. I have to catch my ride to Toronto right after my set, so everything’s all packed to travel already. I’ll just Uber it there.”
“You’re really blowing up, aren’t you?” I try for some casual conversation even though it’s not Paige’s strong suit. “Playing Montreal tonight, sets in Toronto for the next two weeks. You’re gonna be headlining Tomorrowland any day now.”
The corner of her mouth pulls up. It’s the Paige equivalent of joyous beaming.
“Thanks, farm boy.”
I sigh and lean my head against her doorframe. “Why? Why does everyone always call me that?”
