Page 34 of Latte Girl
Steve is hovering beside me. I keep my eyes glued to myphone.
“Hey, Hailey,” he starts, shuffling his feet, “things got pretty hot back there, and it got methinking.”
“Did it?” I ask, still staring at the tiny car moving on myscreen.
“Come homewithme.”
I jerk my head up as I feel his hand close around mine. He’s staring at me, eyes narrowed as he squints to keep me in focus. He sways to the throbbing beat from inside that can still be heard on thesidewalk.
I picture myself going home with him, falling into bed and ignoring the taste of alcohol on his breath as I let him pull my dress off my body. I imagine him sliding himself between my legs, thrusting with the frantic intensity that always made him look both excited and scared. The sex we had thrilled me with its newness, but if I’m honest with myself, I know I didn’t break up with Steve just because of ourschedules.
Looking at him now, I realize that Steve was some kind of gateway drug, a mellow high that left me craving something stronger. I needed someone who could make me lose myself to my own body, make my back arch beneath me and coax me past the edge of control. I needed someone who would throw me up against a wall and fuck me so hard I forgot how to do anything but begformore.
That was never going to beSteve.
“I can’t, Steve,” I say as my car pulls up beside us. “I justcan’t.”
