Me
 
 √-1 (IT’S IMAGINARY BECAUSE I CAN’T EVEN QUANTIFY THIS)
 
 Megan
 
 Did you ask about the blonde?
 
 Me
 
 No.
 
 Me
 
 I got distracted.
 
 Me
 
 BY HIS MOUTH
 
 Megan
 
 Of course you did.
 
 P.S. To whoever decided that morning deliveries should happen before 7 a.m.: I both hate you and want to send you a thank you card.
 
 P.P.S. Is it weird that him getting territorial over his friends checking me out was kind of hot? Just going to file that revelation away with all my other questionable life choices.
 
 Comments: Still Disabled
 
 Share: Only if you want the Wine Club to add “Early Morning Lobby Liaisons” to their romance novel research notes
 
 DEFCON 1: BIKER EDITION
 
 Posted by Anonymous at 2:49 p.m.
 
 March 31
 
 Things that sound like a good idea when you’re supposed to be working:
 
 Creating a spreadsheet analysing every interaction you’ve ever had with your hot biker neighbour
 
 Googling “what does it mean when a biker gets possessive in the lobby”
 
 Convincing yourself that memorising motorcycle engine sounds is a totally normal hobby
 
 All of the above while trying to explain to your boss why you haven’t fixed Johnson’s code yet
 
 (Spoiler alert: None of these are actually good ideas, and Johnson’s code is still broken.)
 
 Me
 
 HE’S COOKING ME DINNER TONIGHT
 
 Megan
 
 You mentioned that. Three times.
 
 Me