SHE WOKE BECAUSE HER BACK was on fire, her left wrist throbbing with a nearly numbing pain. She struggled to open her eyes, staring around in bewilderment before remembering where they were.
Kaine was sitting beside her, awake but haggard. He was leaning forward, a hand pressed against his chest as though all his ribs were cracked.
“Are you—all right?” She struggled to sit up.
He nodded jerkily. “Fine. I’m sure it’ll pass.”
His throat was still hoarse and raw. He’d torn it apart screaming, and now things like that would take time to heal on their own.
“What will pass?” She tried to reach out but only managed to brush her fingers against his coat. Her body felt boneless. “What’s happening?”
“It’s nothing. I’m just not used to feeling—human anymore,” he said.
She managed to get close enough to reach out. He was right, there was nothing wrong, but he felt delicate as a spiderweb inside. If a single thread snapped, it might all be for nothing.
She rested her head on his shoulder, breathing slowly. “You have to be so careful. It could take months, maybe even years before your soul fully integrates again. No vivimancy or animancy, nothing that could strain your vitality at all. One mistake could be enough to kill you. And you can’t lean into the array anymore. You won’t regenerate, and it could burn your back open.”
He tucked a curl behind her ear. “You already told me all this yesterday. You know, I do make a habit of listening when you talk.”
She nodded but couldn’t help herself. “You have to be careful.”
“I will be. Now, are you all right?”
“Just tired,” she said, slumping, but the pain across her shoulders felt like she was being rebranded.
“How’s your back?”
She winced. She hadn’t wanted to bring it up, because she knew it would bother him that he couldn’t heal it.
“I think the salve wore off,” she said. “It’s starting to hurt a little.”
He started to reach.
“Don’t,” she said. “Give me a minute and then we’ll use the salve so we can go.”
“We’ll rest till dark,” he said. “Amaris is too recognisable for travel during the day. It’s a few days’ journey to the coast.”
When her eyes opened again, it was dark outside. Kaine was packing the saddlebags. He looked up the instant she stirred. “Are you strong enough for more travel?”
They would have stayed if she said no, but she knew the more distance they put between themselves and Paladia, the less likely they were to be tracked down. They were racing against time. The Abeyance wouldn’t wait.
“Yes,” she lied.
They flew almost the whole night. The sky was silvering with signs of dawn when Amaris landed again. There was no cabin. Kaine removed Amaris’s saddle, and they slept leaning against her furry sides, her black wings blotting out the daylight as the sun rose.
When Helena opened her eyes, Kaine was still asleep beside her, his face turned towards her as if he’d fallen asleep staring at her.
She traced her eyes across his face. His now mortal face, softly illuminated.
They were free.
Her heart swelled inside her chest.
It felt like a dream. One wrong move and it would all dissolve. Even staring at him, she could not shake the feeling that it wasn’t real. And even if it somehow was, then it would not last.
The beautiful things in her life never did.
He was so still that she reached out, fingers trembling. At her touch, his eyebrows furrowed, and his eyes opened. She watched the light fill them as he looked at her.