Page 326 of Alchemised
Helena started to answer, but it wasn’t a question and it wasn’t directed at her. He’d turned back to Rhea.
“You’re going to trust her after what she did to Soren?”
Helena flinched, her mind nearly pitching itself into that clawing wound inside her. She swallowed hard. “Luc, Soren died. I’m sorry I couldn’t save him, but this procedure for Titus could work. Think of how valuable it would be to get him back.”
Luc looked back at her again, a look of disgust in his eyes. “That’s what this is about to you? Value?” He looked at Titus, who’d grown restless from the tension in the room. “You look at what you did to him, and see a wasted military asset?”
“What? No. That’s not what I meant.”
He stared at her again, his eyes blistering as sunburn. “You lay as much as a finger on him, and I’ll—”
“She won’t,” Rhea said, breaking in. “Thank you, Helena—Healer Marino, I appreciate the offer, but I think we’ll pass.”
Luc gave a sharp nod and then turned on his heel, walking out without a backwards glance. Sebastian wavered, looking at Rhea and Titus, his expression conflicted before he turned, following Luc. When they were gone, Rhea’s face crumpled, and she gave an audible gasp before pressing her face in her hands.
Helena could find no words. She sat numb with shock as Rhea stood, not looking at Helena as she led Titus out.
Once she was alone, Helena pulled her gloves on and headed for the Alchemy Tower. When the lift opened, she was surprised when Sebastian stepped out alone, a weary expression on his face. He paused, resting a hand on her shoulder. “It was good of you to try.”
Helena couldn’t quite bring herself to look at him. She stared at his chest, at the suncrest on his armour.
“Why is he doing this?” she asked. “Everyone understands. Even if they think it was wrong, they understand. He won’t even try.”
Sebastian sighed. “You know why.”
She wasn’t sure that she did, but she nodded and stepped into the lift. There were three guards stationed outside Luc’s door, and they shook their heads when she approached.
She went to her own room and climbed out the window, walking carefully up and around the low slope. Luc’s hair gleamed golden in the setting sun. He was sitting hunched on his heels, twirling something in his fingers. He brought it up to his mouth, flames sparking in his fingertips as he inhaled.
His whole body seemed to come loose, and he sagged in on himself.
Watching, she was reminded of how soft his face used to be, the brightness of it. Now the war had chewed him down to the bone. He sat there, out of armour, so shrivelled he reminded her of an insect exoskeleton, like the shed dragonfly nymphs that clung to the water reeds. He was hollowed out.
Smoke curled from his lips as he slowly exhaled.
He was smoking opium.
She stared in horror at how casually he did so. As though it were an old habit.
He pulled the pipe from his mouth, catching sight of her. His expression hardened, growing more alert. “Go away.”
“No,” she said, and came closer.
He spun the pipe in his fingers again, his jaw rippling with anger. If he hit her again, she’d probably fall from the Tower and die.
She stood only a few steps away. “I couldn’t save him. Even if I’d killed myself trying, it wouldn’t have been enough. What is it you wish I’d done instead?”
Rather than answer, he shook like an autumn leaf on the verge of falling loose. He seemed to be trying to speak, but at the same time his hand was bringing the pipe back to his lips, fingers sparking a feeble flame. He inhaled so long that when he stopped, the pipe nearly tumbled from his fingers.
She feared he’d fall, and knelt to catch him, but he looked up, meeting her eyes, and he—he didn’t look angry anymore, he just looked exhausted.
“What happened to us, Hel?”
She stared at him, and her pathetic, starved heart leapt for a moment before she realised the obvious. This wasn’t Luc; this was the opium talking.
“A war.” She looked away from him to the ruined city before them. A view which had once been so beautiful.
“You used to believe in me,” he said, his voice faraway. “What did I do that made you stop?”
