Page 25 of Devil on Skates
“I don’t want any drama,” I say quietly. “Dad thinks Keith’s a good choice for my future, and maybe he’s right. The Costellos have connections that could help my career.”
“Your career as a physical therapist?” She raises an eyebrow. “Somehow I doubt it. They’re more interested in investments and things like that.”
I look down, avoiding her gaze. “It’s complicated.”
“It doesn’t have to be.” She covers my hand with hers. “Honey, look at me.”
I force myself to meet her eyes.
“You don’t have to live your life for your dad’s plans. Trust me, I did that for way too long, and let me tell you something. It doesn’t work.”
“It’s different for me,” I say. “Dad’s been supportive of my education, even after the accident—”
“Those aren’t gifts if they come with strings attached,” she interrupts. “If he’s using money to control your life, that’s manipulation and not generosity.”
“It’s not that simple, Mom.”
“It never is.” She sighs and squeezes my hand before letting go. “Just... try to enjoy this time. College should be about exploring who you are, not just ticking boxes for your dad. Date someone who makes you happy and excited, not someone who looks good on paper.”
Little does she know, she’s pinpointed the very thing I’m struggling with—the pull and the excitement that I feel for someone my dad would hate.
“I’ll try,” I say, meaning something very different from what she thinks.
She studies me, her gaze piercing. “Is there someone else? Someone who’s not Mr. Perfect Resume?”
My cheeks burn before I can stop it. “No,” I say way too quickly. “There’s no one else.”
“Are you sure?” Her lips curve slightly. “Because that blush says otherwise.”
“I’m sure,” I insist, but the image of Xavier and the way he pinned me against the wall and kissed me flashes through my mind. “I just wish I had more freedom to figure things out without all these expectations.”
“That’s all I want for you. The freedom I never had.” She glances at her phone. “I should go. Owen’s expecting me for lunch with some business people.”
As we get up, she hugs me tightly. “Remember, honey, your life belongs to you, and not to your dad. Don’t waste your youth trying to be someone you’re not.”
As I watch her leave, I let out a sigh. Easy for her to say when she’s with her new family. She doesn’t have to deal with Dad’s quiet pressure and his way of making me feel both loved and not quite enough at the same time.
My phone buzzes with a message from someone I don’t recognize.
Party at my place Tuesday night. Hope you can make it.
There’s also an image of a map with the location. Is this Xavier’s doing? I check the sender’s profile. A hockey player. One of Xavier’s teammates.
Another message pops up on my screen.
Andrei invited you to his party yet? Bring Keith. It’s a good chance to socialize with your peers and have some fun.
Wow, so it wasn’t Xavier who made Andrei invite me to the party. It was my dad. This is beyond embarrassing. I can’t believe he actually told his player to invite his daughter to a party, because I doubt Andrei asked him if he could do it. My cheeks burn just thinking about the awkwardness of that situation and Andrei not being able to refuse.
A small party that’s supposed to feel like freedom is now just another thing my dad is making me do.
For a wild second, I think about texting Mom and asking if I can transfer to a college near her, crash in her guest room, and escape my dad’s control. But the idea evaporates almost instantly from my mind.
Owen tolerates me during holidays but isn’t exactly welcoming, and Dad would see that move as the ultimate betrayal, like me walking away from the path he’s backed all along. Besides, Owen’s two young kids would probably feel like I was disrupting their lives.
My mom told me my life was mine, and not my dad’s.
If only it were that easy, because my life’s never really been mine. Being the only kid of divorced parents who want completely different things means I’ve learned to switch versions of myself depending on who I need approval from. With Dad, I’m ambitious and focused. With Mom, more creative and emotional.
