Page 14 of Saddled in Secrets
Some might think my pain would get worse from horseback riding, but it’s actually beneficial for me. I’m aware that’s not the norm, which goes to show how extra twisted scoliosis is. It impacts everyone differently. What helps some might hurt others. I just stick to what makes me feel better and horses do that for me—in more ways than one. My worries melt away when I’m in the saddle. Crochet and channel surfing can fix the rest later.
But just as I’m about to stand, our conversation from before this detour prods at me. I’m still not sure how to broach the subject. “Weren’t we talking about something important?”
Dad hangs his head as humor shakes through him. “You’re asking the old fart with a poor memory?”
“At least you’re aware of your downfalls,” I tease.
He makes a shooing motion. “Go ride your horse and leave me in peace. It’s time for my mid-morning nap.”
But I stay rooted to the chair. “Dad?”
“Bianca?”
“How much do you know about Colton’s past?” I blurt the question even though it’s been perched on my tongue for hours.
Brody could give me an answer, but my brother is on my shit list. I’d rather avoid him for the time being. Besides, my father has to know. He’s the most reliable source as far as I’m concerned.
His keen stare narrows on me. “Whatever you’re about to say is better off being spoken to the man himself.”
A pit forms in my stomach while the unavoidable route to the truth presents itself. “That’s exactly what I’m afraid of.”
“He ain’t gonna bite ya.”
Warmth spreads through me like a lethal infection. “I wouldn’t be too sure.”
“Something I should be concerned about?” Dad’s voice carries a protective edge.
If only I could pass off my problems that easily. “I can handle him myself.”
“Mhmm, that’s my brave girl.” He beams with pride. “Didn’t raise you to shy away from the tough stuff.”
“Kinda wish you had.”
“Gonna make me dizzy goin’ ‘round in circles, kiddo.”
“Welcome to the circus.” I bobble my head back and forth.
“Just call me the ring master. But hey, I’ll tell you this much.” Dad leans closer as if he’s about to spill very expensive tea. “Colton will do just about anything for you.”
My lungs quit functioning until I consider his conspiratorial tone. “Ohhh, no you don’t. You already played blackmail matchmaker with Paisley and Brody. I’m not falling into this trap.”
He folds his hands over his middle, reclining deeper into the sloped seat. “Suit yourself.”
All I can do is laugh while knowing full well Dad is far from done sharing his opinion on the matter.
My gaze haunts Bianca’s rushed stride toward the horse barn. I haven’t taken my eyes off her since she returned from that unexpected disappearance. She left too abruptly for me to tag along, but I tracked her location to an unfortunately familiar area. There’s been a sinking feeling in my gut ever since.
I adjust the brim of my hat and consider the repercussions. Bianca hates me enough as it is. If the truth of my past comes out, she’ll never speak to me again. Can’t see much of a future if that happens.
Damn, I’m in too deep. What started as a forbidden attraction to my best friend’s younger sister became a full-blown obsession when she blossomed into an undeniable need. Toss in the protective instincts I gained along the way and here we are. Theintensity borders on panic at times, which is why I don’t let her roam too far.
I almost lost my mind after she left unannounced this morning. Darkness threatened to consume me, along with the demand to chase her. Those urges were about to take the wheel, even just to follow her home, but then she pulled into the driveway.
My thoughts are still in tatters as I watch her from the shadows behind the tool shed. I’ll be on her ass for the rest of the day. It’s not rational or normal and I’ve learned to accept that.
These stalker tendencies didn’t exist until I met Bianca Benson. If she knew the lengths I’ve gone to in recent years, she’d probably run or have me arrested. I’d almost like to see her try to get rid of me. The tightness in my chest only eases when I have her in my sight. She’s awoken parts of me that were better left sleeping, but there’s no shaking me loose now. Satisfaction carves my lips into a smirk.
As if determined to push me from hiding, Bianca bends to pet a dog that’s run up to her. She gushes all over the pampered pit bull while sticking her ass in the air. Lucky pup. Not sure which one this is. There are too many to count. Her bleeding heart rescues the lost causes from shelters and rehabilitates them into faithful companions. Maybe that’s why I’m drawn to her—in hopes she’ll give me a life worth living. But I’ll never let myself have her. It’s not like she’d argue.
