Page 46 of The One Night Match
“I never said I didn’t want you, Cruz. I’d be surprised if there’s a woman on earth who doesn’t want your dick. What I said was I didn’t want to be married. To anyone. Especially in the Mafia.” The words tumble out all at once, without permission, laying out the parts of my hesitation that I haven’t explicitly told him about.
He pulls back far enough for him to stare down at me. “You want out of our marriage because of the Mafia?”
I nod slowly, watching for any signs of anger. “I don’t want to live this life, Cruz. I spent years escaping my own family, only to be signed up for the matchmaker service without my knowledge, and when it came time to fill in the questionnaire, I had no choice, or they would have done it for me.”
We’re in far too compromising a position to be having this conversation, but he makes no move to give me the space my mind desperately needs to cool my body off.
Having Cruz so close is always a test of my restraint, but half-naked in bed with his hardness pressing against my thigh? Yeah, I’m struggling.
He stares down at me like I’m a puzzle he’s trying to solve before a new resolve settles behind his dark eyes. “Tell me what it is about the Mafia that you don’t want any part in.”
It’s not a question. It’s an order, and I’m compelled to tell him the truth. Maybe if I lay it all on the line, he’ll give in and give me what I want. “Can we discuss this without you pinning me to the bed?”
“No, I’m good right where I am.”
I huff out a sigh and drag my eyes off his face, looking across the room to hype myself up for what I’m about to tell him. It took a lot of years and a fuck ton of therapy to get past it, and here I am, preparing to break myself open for a man just as brutal as the one from my nightmares.
No, Cruz is nothing like Jeremy, and I refuse to lump him into the same category, regardless of their similarities from the outside looking in.
“When I was seventeen, I was promised to a man who was set to become boss of the rival family in San Francisco. Jeremy was charming. He said all the right things, his father and Sergio worked on the deal for months, and Jeremy had the choice between me and my sisters. When he chose me, I felt special for the first time in my life. My sisters were always perfect, always chosen above me, and for the first time, I got chosen. I was excited.” I shake my head, my voice even and lacking any emotion despite the riot in my chest, making it hard to breathe. “Our wedding was set for the weekend after my eighteenth birthday, but my parents and Sergio decided it would be best if I moved into Jeremy’s house the day after my birthday, so we could get to know one another.”
“Kitten,” Cruz murmurs, brushing his thumb across my cheek, and it’s only now I realize I’m crying. The memory of this time in my life is dragging all the hurt right back to the surface.
“I’m fine,” I whisper. “It happened a long time ago. I’m over it.”
He looks down at me doubtfully, but he doesn’t argue, his thumb tracing comforting circles, never moving from my face.
“The first couple of nights were okay. We went out to a fancy dinner, and he gave me a kiss good night at my bedroom door the first night, and then the second evening we spent the night in, just getting to know one another.” I swallow heavily. “But thenext morning, everything changed. It was like a switch had been flipped, like he was a completely different person.
“He tore me out of bed, screaming at me about not being a virgin despite that being promised. I tried to explain that I told his father that when he asked, that I was open and honest all the way along, but he wouldn’t listen. He just kept hitting me until I was certain I was about to die. I think a little part of me hoped I would, just so the pain would stop.” I don’t try to stop the tears anymore, instead letting them fall. Maybe if Cruz sees how much this life has cost me, he’ll be more likely to let me go. “He left me there, and I was too scared to move. I was worried that when he came back, it would be worse if I moved from where he left me. But he didn’t come back.
“One of his maids found me and called the family doctor. And when my parents arrived, I thought they would whisk me away immediately, because surely they wouldn’t want someone like that marrying their daughter, but instead they asked what I did to deserve it.” I laugh bitterly, my chest aching so badly I’m afraid it’ll crack open. “Jeremy ended up calling off the wedding, saying he wouldn’t marry a whore, and as soon as I healed enough that I could get myself out of bed, I fished my acceptance letter from Yale from where I hid it in the back of one of my drawers, and I moved across the country the next day.”
I finally focus on his face again, but the last thing I expect is to find pure, unadulterated fury staring back at me.
TWENTY-FOUR
CRUZ
Watching Riley cry is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.
I know that sounds ridiculous, seeing as I killed my father five years ago and lead one of the biggest criminal enterprises on the Western seaboard. But, fuck—nothing prepared me for seeing the devastation on her face as she bore her soul to me.
It doesn’t escape me that the only reason she’s telling me at all is because she thinks it will convince me to let her go, but it won’t.
Nothing will.
If anything, it only makes me more determined to make her happy because that means no one will ever get the chance to treat her like that again, and her parents will never have the opportunity to marry her off to scum like Jeremy Moretti.
I know of him, but we’ve never met face-to-face.
That will be changing because he needs to pay for hurting my wife. He needs to be wiped off the face of the earth for putting hands on a woman like that.
“Riley, I will never hurt you like that. I would rather cut off my fucking arms than raise a hand to you. Please tell me youknow that.” My voice is strained, the rage battering down on me barely contained.
“I know,” she whispers, her swollen eyes peering up at me through damp lashes. “I know you wouldn’t. But that doesn’t mean one of your men won’t. If we have kids, we’ll be expected to marry them off. What if we have a daughter? I couldn’t do that to her. I couldn’t force that on her.” She shakes her head, her resolve snapping back into place. “It’s better that you find someone who can be what you need, because I will never be the perfect Mafia wife.”
“Kitten, do you know how many families across the country have approached me about Lexi’s hand in marriage?”
