Page 10 of The Nook for Brooks
Then together, “We’ll be your waiters today.”
“Are you Benji’s parents?” I asked, realizing too late I was supposed to pretend I couldn’t speak English.
As soon as the words left my lips, the pair of them gasped.
“Yes, we are,” Lonnie said. She turned to Ronnie. “Sweetie, it would appear our reputation proceeds us.”
“I think you mean, itprecedesyou,” I said.
Ronnie and Lonnie ignored my correction and gasped again. “Is that an accent I detect?” Lonnie asked. “Where are you from, sweetie? No wait, let us guess.”
Instantly they both closed their eyes.
“Say something in your native tongue,” said Ronnie.
I looked at them both as they stood before me, eyes shut. “Um. Okay. G’day.”
“Oooooh, that’s a tough one,” said Ronnie.
“I think I know,” said Lonnie with a nod, eyes still shut. “Is it Ontario?”
“No.”
“Can we get a vowel?” asked Ronnie.
“There’s an A in my country’s name.”
“Oooooh, it’s on the tip of my tongue,” said Ronnie.
“I think I know,” said Lonnie confidently. “Is it Fiji?”
“There’s no A in Fiji.”
“Oh, you saidA. I thought you saidI.”
“It’s the accent, sweetie,” Ronnie told her. “It’s a tough one. Any other clues?”
“We have kangaroos where I’m from. And koalas. And the Sydney Opera House. And the Great Barrier Reef… where Nemo lives.”
Suddenly Lonnie jumped up and down like an excited gameshow contestant. “Oh, I know, I know, I know. It’s where the Hobbits are from! New Zealand.”
I shrugged, not that they could see. “Close enough.”
They opened their eyes and grinned triumphantly, taking a good look at me. Lonnie even leaned her elbows on the table, chin propped in her hands. “We don’t get New Zealanders in here very often.”
“Actually, I’m from Australia.”
“That’s part of New Zealand, right?” asked Ronnie.
“Not really.”
“Do you eat croissants back home?” Lonnie asked, still on the gameshow theme by gesturing her hand up and down the menu like she was presenting a set of overpriced luggage up for grabs.
I blinked. “Yeah. We’ve got bakeries.”
Ronnie slapped the table like I’d just cracked the DaVinci Code. “Hear that, Lon? They’ve got bakeries in Australia.”
“Yes, but are the croissants shaped the same there?” Lonnie asked. “I mean, do they make them upside down in Australia?”
