Page 154 of Insolence
But gods be damned. Tonight I’m holding my breath and waiting for her answer.
“Here,” she finally says. “Of course.”
Thank you, thank you, thank you.My charcoal pencil swoops across the paper, laying down the rough outline of her reclining form. “Why do you say it like that?”
One arm is slung over her hip, the other propped on a tasseled pillow. She wears a flowing gown with straps of satin ribbon tied in bows at her shoulders.
A lavish crown of thousand-petal roses encircles her head. They’re her absolute favorite flowers. She adores the cream-colored petals with their streaks and dashes of deep pink. Wants them somehow incorporated in the final portrait.
They’re breathtaking on her.
“Because.” Her tone is flat. Something strange passes over her face. “This is where you are.”
“That’s ridiculous. I’m not Illiam, so where I am is of no concern.”
“It is to me.”
I swallow. Fill in the area where her fingers tangle in the pillow tassels.
They tighten around the silken cords. “Men of his status take consorts all the time. They’re practicallyexpectedto take multiple partners. So long as we’re all treated well.”
“Relax your hand.”
She sends me a look. “I’m not suggesting we make it public knowledge. How is this any different otherwise?”
“I have no idea what you’re referring to.”
“This. Me and you! What else?”
I go still at the shock of it. At the weight in her voice. “So we’re talking about it openly now?”
“I don’t see why not.” She gives a bitter laugh. “It’s time, don’t you think?”
“Women like us are barely tolerated as it is.” I scrub at the paper, blending shadows between her fingers. Damn near ripping it. “Correction: women like you. Most days, I’m not sure there’s aplacefor someone like me.”
“You think I don’t know that?”
“Let’s be honest. The worst thing you could possibly do is shame your family by takingmeas a lover.”
She rolls her eyes. “Pleasetell me more about shaming my family.”
Hot silence stretches between us.
She sighs at last, a listless smile curling her lips. “You know, I’ve been thinking.” She sits up, bare feet hitting the floor. “We should do a nude tonight.” She tugs one of the ribbons holding up her gown before I can protest.
The satin unravels, releasing from her shoulder. Time drags obscenely. Fabric slides down until the neckline catches on her nipple, stopping short of revealing too much.
I watch, a slack-jawed idiot.
Her laugh is soft as she reaches for the ribbon at her other shoulder, jarring me back to my senses.
“Stopit, Tiss,” I growl.
“Mmm, stop what?”
“Just stop.” I put my pencil behind my ear. Set my hardboard aside. “I’ve been thinking too. This isn’t a good idea. We shouldn’t continue.”
“You mean tonight?”
