Page 47 of Insolence
Trembling from head to toe, I count the doors to Sadrie’s room.
It swings open when I’m an arm’s length away, scaring me so badly I give a hoarse shriek.
She yelps in shock. “Tiss? What are you—?”
“Shhh,” I hiss, pushing her back inside. I let go of her once we’re safely in her room, pulling the door closed and leaning against it.
“You’reshaking. Did something happen, songbird?” All sweetness and concern, she cradles my face in her hands.
The warmth of her skin soothes me just enough to get out what I saw—what happened to the Screamer. She walks away when I’m finished, muttering something and looking as perplexed as I am panicky.
She turns. “Why would Kerrigan do such a thing?”
“Hell if I know! This is a horrible place, Sadrie. I’ve beentryingto tell you. Now, put on some socks and grab your heavy boots. We’re leaving right this second.”
She drops onto her bed. “Tiss. Ican’t.” Her face crumbles, shoulders slumping.
“Didn’t think I’d have to talk you into this.” I kneel on the floor at her feet, taking her hands in mine. “We can’t dawdle any more, sweetheart. Prayers start in an hour, tops.”
“Forty-five minutes,” she mumbles.
Terrific. I get to my feet, head reeling, casting about her room. “Where do you keep— Oh.” I spot the dresser beneath her window.
Her sigh is heavy. “I can’t leave, Tiss.”
“Of course you can.” I’m tearing her drawers open and slamming them shut. “Just get up and leave. You won’t beableto soon enough, so I’d suggest getting your perky little ass into gear.”
“I’m trying to tell you Ibelonghere,” she says.
“What?” Facing her now, the dread within me spirals and eddies.
“You know how Cordelia told us the goddess came to her in a… a vision?”
“Oh, no,” I groan, plopping down on the bed next to her. “Not you, too.”
“Tiss, please. Eisha came to me in a dream. Just now, before I woke up. I saw—” she falters, glancing around the cozy room. “I saw what Cordelia saw. It looked like hazy white light. I felt the most profound sense of love andjoy, surrounding me and filling me up. I can’t explain how, but Iknewthe light was her. Then I heard her voice.” She grabs my hand, sitting up straighter. “She spoke to me.”
Bewildered, my heart deflated, I shake my head. “What did she say?”
“I’m hers. I belong to her.” Sadrie’s expression goes soft and distant. “She told me she has plans for me—apurpose. When it’s time for the lottery, I’m going to draw a white sphere. So yousee, Tiss,” she clutches my hand. Eyebrows rising on the inside corners, she’s practically pleading when she says, “I can’t leave the temple. I don’twantto. While I hear you, and I’m trying to understand, I don’t think you should, either.”
“Why on earth not? I haven’t had one of these goddess visions!” Frustration climbs up my throat, scraping behind my eyes. “I’m scared, Sadrie.”
“I know.” She pulls me into her. “I’m not going to let anything bad happen to you. And I know you don’t believe me right now, but it’s all going to work out in the end—I can feel it.”
The tears crest as soon as her arms go around me.
Voice gentle, hand in my hair, she asks, “Didn’t you say this Screamer girl was trying to run?”
“Yeah.”
“Thendon’trun. Do the opposite of what she did.”
That… makes a maddening amount of sense. “What about Cara and Rosalie?”
“What about them? You didn’t see what happened to provoke Sister Kerrigan.” She touches her chest. “ButIknow things will turn out all right. I can feel it, intuitively. Now let’s get something to eat. You’ll probably feel better with something in your stomach.”
I pull away, blotting my tears. Still far from convinced, I’ve run out of steam to argue. Realistically, it’s too late to run anyway. By now, the courtyard will be crawling with sisters and handmaidens, especially since they intend to hold the lottery at the Waymark.
