Page 87 of Charlie Sunshine
“Did youshowhim that, though?”
I suddenly remember Charlie “giving” me that song this morning, his face warm and his eyes lit up as the tender lyrics played. Then I remember the piss-taking way I’d replied. I groan. “Shit!”
“Exactly,” he says. “You’ve been flippant, haven’t you?”
“How do you know?”
He looks over at where his ex is standing, dark and handsome amongst his group of wedding guests. As usual, Max looks up, as if he’s aware of every step and movement that Felix makes. Felix just shakes his head. “It’s a family trait,” he says.
“I was flippant this morning when he tried to say something loving. It was only supposed to be for a minute, and then I was going to think of something better, but then he had a seizure, and I got occupied in looking after him.” I’m rambling, but he nods as if he understands.
“And that might be another problem, Misha.”
“What?”
“Do you know another word apart from ‘what’?”
“Not at this precise moment.”
He shrugs. “Charlie’s a very proud man. He prides himself on being positive and happy and good to people. That means he doesn’t react well when his body lets him down. I bet that he was uncomfortable with having a seizure in front of you. I’d also lay odds that he took one look at that bloke you were talking to and thought you’d behappier with someone like that. Charlie’s a caretaker by nature. He’s not comfortable when the shoe’s on the other foot.”
“But it’s the same shoe it’s always been.”
“But you’re not the same people now,” he says patiently. “You’re boyfriends now. It’s vastly different.”
“I don’t understand any of this,” I say almost petulantly. “I love him, and he’s mine to look after. Where’s the problem in that, Felix?”
He nudges me. “Have you actuallytoldhim that?”
“Yes,” I say slowly. Then I give myself a moment to think about it. Shock blasts through me. “Oh shit,” I mutter. “I thought he knew. He knows me inside out. He should know that I love him.”
“Why should he? He’s not bloody Mystic Molly. Misha, you have to tell people what you’re feeling.” He shakes his head disapprovingly. “Your communication skills are sadly lacking. Good job you work with hedges, although Monty Don is probably better with people than you.”
I frown at him. “You’re a piss-taking prat,” I say slowly, feeling the alcohol numbing my tongue. “How did you get so wise?”
“Well, it wasn’t from setting a good example,” he says flippantly. “More learning from bad experiences.”
I look behind me and smile. “Speaking of bad experiences, I think your ex might need a hand.” I nudge him. “Don’t look now but Auntie Violet has cornered him.”
He follows my gaze and snorts. Max is standing on the dancefloor looking somewhat worried while my aunt gyrates around him with her arms in the air and her hips swaying madly to Julio Iglesias’s “Moonlight Lady.”
“She loves Julio,” I say meditatively.
Max looks imploringly at Felix, and to my astonishment, Felix immediately stands up. “Where are you going?” I ask. “You’re surely not going to rescue him, are you?”
“No,” he scoffs. He pats my shoulder. “I’m going to ask if the DJ has any more of Julio’s hits.” I shake my head, and he rubs my hair affectionately. “Promise me you won’t drink much more.”
I mouth the word “no” as I watch him go and then turn back determinedly to the young barman. “Another one and keep them coming,” Iinstruct him. He stares at me assessingly and then slides a shot glass in front of me.
Sometime later, I stir. “I’m not going to put up with this,” I say, slamming my hand down on the counter. “Ugh! What’s that?”
“Someone’s plate from the buffet,” the barman says, offering me a napkin to wipe my hand.
“Well, what’s it doing there and why have they left so much food? It’s not environmentally friendly.” I groan. “Thisis what Charlie’s done to me. He’s given me a social conscience.”
“Better than the clap,” my new adviser proffers.
“You’re right, my friend,” I say, hearing the slur in my voice. “Totally right.” I slam my drink down and wonder briefly if it contained something to affect my balance because the room is spinning slightly.
