Page 71 of Absolutely Pucked
“Look, you were going to take the C anyway,” Boden reminded me.
I pulled a face, but I couldn’t exactly disagree. I was, no matter how hard I’d been protesting against the responsibility.
“Hugo decided he wants to leave sooner than he originally planned. He wants to be able to travel with me and it makes the most amount of sense that the job goes to one of us—and Tuck and I are both leaving. You’re the only one who can do it,” Boden pointed out.
I shuddered. “Fuck me.”
“Babe, you can’t spend the rest of your life stocking oranges and making small talk with all the Deborahs and Sandys of this fucking town,” Tucker said.
I pulled a face. “Plenty of people work in supermarkets for a living.”
“Yeah, and if you had a passion for oranges and Sandy’s latest Coach Outlet find, I might encourage you. But we know you don’t. We know you feel like you’re drowning.”
“It’s bad enough you’ve been refusing to date,” Boden cut in. “I know it sucks to watch us be happy the way that we’ve been happy lately, and we really want that for you.”
My entire chest began to burn. Shit. This would be the perfect time to spill my guts. The perfect time to rip off the Band-Aid and plead for mercy. To beg them to understand that Killian was different—that in spite of the past, he wasn’t a monster.
That love could make a difference.
The words dried up and stuck to the inside of my throat like cold fireplace ash.
“What’s that face?” Boden asked.
Tucker leaned in to try and see me more clearly. “You’re hiding something.”
“I’m…look,” I said. I was unwilling to lie, but the truth was too hard. I’d promised Jonah, but I needed a little more time. “Can we stop trying to psychoanalyze me here? I’m hungry and tired, and you two are being annoying.”
Tucker raised his brows, and Boden seemed surprised.
The silence rang on for a long beat.
“He’s getting laid,” Tucker finally said.
“What? First of all, how fucking dare you,” I started.
Boden shook his head. “Yep. Laid. Whatever. Tell us when you’re ready.” In the distance, a buzzer sounded.
“Your food’s ready,” I said weakly.
Boden stood up from the chair and moved back into the kitchen while Tucker continued to stare at me.
“Stop it, or I’m gonna put shrimp in your car.”
He grinned. “It’s not my car. It’s Deo’s car, and you like him too much to make him sad.”
I hated that he was right.
Tucker’s expression fell after a second. “You’re okay, right? I mean…no one’s hurting you, are they? Because I swear to God, I will fuck them up?—”
“No. No one’s hurting me,” I told him quickly. This was the second time I’d been asked that, so I guess it was obvious. All the pain I was feeling was because I was a gigantic dipshit who had to go and fall for the wrong man. “I’m just going through something. But I’ll be alright.”
Tucker gave me a sideways look, then said, “You know I love you more than anything, right?”
“Right.” My voice was weak.
“And I’ve got your back no matter what?”
“I know.” And really, that was the entire problem. I was the traitor here, and he was the saint.
