Page 141 of The Devil of Clan Sinclair
He wanted to erase the last day from her mind, but he couldn’t. He wanted to take all the pain from her memory, but he couldn’t do that, either. All he could do—and he had every intention of doing it—was remain at her side and give her comfort and support whenever she needed it.
The crew of thePrincesskept their gaze away from her. He wore borrowed clothing, but at least it was dry. She didn’t have that luxury, though the blanket covered her well enough. He didn’t want to think of how she’d appeared on the deck of theOregon,nearly naked and fleeing from Henderson.
If he could have pummeled the man again, he would have.
“I’ve sent Jack to Drumvagen,” he said. “He’ll send the carriage back for us. As soon as I’ve spoken to the harbormaster, we’ll go home.”
She nodded but didn’t turn or look at him, and when she spoke, it was almost like she addressed the scene before her.
“Will they send a ship after theOregon? Will he be arrested?”
He wished he had a good answer for her. The fact was, once the other ship was out to sea, the harbormaster had no influence. The captain was law. Boarding the ship would be tantamount to declaring war on theOregon.
“They’ll send word to America,” he said. “That would be the most practical thing to do.”
“But it doesn’t mean they’ll arrest him, does it?”
“No.”
She took a deep breath. “It’s a great deal of water, isn’t it? Some of it is very deep. I imagine you could drown easily there.”
“You could drown in a lake, a river, or a basin as well,” he said.
She nodded. “With the aid of a madman you could find a great many ways to die, none of which you’d expect.”
He stood beside her, his hands on the rail, so close he could move his little finger and touch her. He didn’t, however, feeling like these moments were poignant and profound in a way he didn’t completely understand.
“I was never afraid of the river near my house, isn’t that strange?”
“Had you ever seen the ocean?”
She nodded. “I had. But I hadn’t loathed it as much as when we traveled to England. Maybe it wasn’t the ocean I feared as much as a new life. Or maybe it was both. I don’t like the dark, either. Or heights.”
“I remember,” he said. “But you acquitted yourself well on a rope ladder.”
She didn’t smile or otherwise acknowledge his comment. She turned to face him, keeping one hand on the railing.
“I want to overcome all my fears. Otherwise, Alistair will be afraid as well.”
“I don’t think we teach children our fears as much as our limitations,” he said. “My father never wanted to succeed in a grand way with his newspaper and printing business. He didn’t want to have an empire.”
“But you did. I wonder why.”
He smiled, as fascinated by her questions as he’d always been. “Because doing so challenged me? Because I wanted to be someone I wasn’t?”
“I can’t get over Paul killing Lawrence,” she said, having already told him of Henderson’s confession. “I feel responsible.”
“You probably were.”
She glanced at him, her eyes widening.
“I’m certain you were there, encouraging him, helping him hold down the pillow.”
She frowned at him. “You know I did nothing of the sort.”
“However, you insist on taking responsibility for a murder you didn’t even know about until a few hours ago.”
She sighed, her shoulders slumping forward. “It does sound idiotic, doesn’t it? Still, if Paul hadn’t had an obsession with me, Lawrence might still be alive.”
