Page 33 of When A Laird Loves A Lady
Iain glanced at Angus, who shookhis head, and then Rory Mac, who simply shrugged. It seemed the best thing todo was continue on their journey. Even if he could think of the right words tocomfort her, he’d not say them with Angus and Rory Mac listening. “We’ll departnow, unless ye need a moment.”
“No.” She shook her head, her voicetired, even slightly sad.
Once he had settled behind her andthe horses started toward the MacLean’s hold, Iain thought about Marion and whyshe continually put herself at risk to defend him when he’d told her not to.Did she think she had to prove her worth? He suspected it was a possibility,given that her father likely made her feel insufficient. He wanted to ask herabout her life in England, but he’d rather be able to see her face andexpressions in case she tried to conceal the worst from him. Yet, he wanted tolet her know he was thinking of her and that he would make it clear to his clanthat she was important to him.
“When we get to my home, I’ll havea bedchamber made for ye next to mine.”
She turned around sharply, almosttoppling herself. He had to grab hold of her arm to keep her on the horse andturn her back around. “You’re giving me my own bedchamber?”
He could hear the shock in hervoice. He had to hide his sudden grin because he was that pleased that having agrand bedchamber made her happy, even though she’d sleep in his every night. Heknew it was not the custom, but he personally thought a man not sleeping withhis wife was foolish. “I am. And ye can make it grand. It will be the grandestroom in the castle.”
“Oh, Iain, thank you! I, well—”
He thought he heard her sniff.
“Thank you,” she said. “Thank youfor being so considerate and thinking of me. Will it be acceptable for me toalter Catriona’s bedchamber, though? If not, I can leave it or take a differentroom—one less grand.”
Talking of Catriona with Marion wasnot what he had wished, but he didn’t want her to feel uncomfortable, as if shewere taking something that had belonged to Catriona. “It will be fine. Catrionadid nae have her own bedchamber. She shared mine.”
Marion cocked her head to the side.“You neverofferedher one?” Theconfusion was evident in her voice.
“Nay. I preferred she sleep withme, and she thought it was silly to have a chamber she’d never use.”
Marion hunched her shouldersforward. “I see,” she responded in a small voice that made him frown. “Have Iupset ye?”
“No,” she immediately responded,her reply snappish. “I’m simply tired from last night.”
Guilt for letting himself act sofreely and take her with such abandon overcame him. “I’ll nae bed ye tonight,”he proposed reluctantly.
“Please stop talking,” she said.Her tone was not an order but more a plea.
Perhaps his wife was shy about bedtalk. Well, he’d not say another word about last night, then. The problem was,with her pressed between his thighs on the saddle, all he could think about waslast night and how she had felt in his arms. But instead of saying somethingelse that might embarrass her further, he said nothing.
Several hours later, Marion shivered as shescrutinized the cloudy gray sky, and when Iain pulled her against his chest andwrapped an arm around her waist, she didn’t try to move away or protest. Herdesire not to freeze to death overrode her hurt and anger at herself for themoment.
She bit her lip as her visionblurred with the threat of tears. She blinked, a few trickled out of her eyes.She prayed they’d not hit Iain’s hand. She didn’t want him to know she wasupset by his earlier words that his first wife, Catriona, could not besupplanted. Of course she couldn’t. It wasn’t his feeling that way that wasupsetting, though. It was that there was never going to be a place in his heartfor her. He’d told her it was so, but hope had started to grow with his praisesand the way he watched over her. And then last night…
The things he’d done to her and theway he’d made her feel… Well, she’d thought it was the beginning of somethingspecial, that a connection had been forged between them. She’d even foolishlygone to sleep with hopes that she may one day have a piece of his heart. Butshe’d never have his heart. His desire was all he was willing to give ofhimself.
And it was made worse knowing shecould not even say he just wasn’t a sharing and loving man. Obviously, he hadbeen—with Catriona.Shehad shared his bed. Soon his whole clan wouldknow that he didn’t care for Marion enough to allow her to do the same. It washumiliating and hurtful. She felt too much like the child who had always triedto do everything to please her father to gain his love but had never beenenough. She simply refused to exhaust herself trying to gain Iain’s love whenit was clear he had no intention of ever giving it.
She had to be stronger and colder;she could not hope for something that would never be. When he made her feelwarm with a compliment or a touch, she needed to remind herself it was merely lustand would never be more. She could notallowherself to lower her defenses. He was like a handsome conqueror who could stormher heart and take it if she were not very careful, and she knew too well theheartbreak of wanting love from someone who was not capable of giving it.
Iain squeezed her a bit tighter inhis arms, and his fingers fanned across her belly, gently rubbing as if he knewher thoughts. It was so typical of a man to want to take from a woman but notgive in return. Marion held onto this thought and let it fuel her anger. Hewanted to take his pleasure but give nothing back. Her cheeks heated at thememoryof the way he’d lavished kisses on the most sensitive part of her body.
She worried her lip as she thought.She had to confess that he’d given her pleasure and had seemed to love doingit.
He was giving her protection. Hewas quick to keep her safe and care for her. Her heart tugged remembering howhe’d come to her rescue with Froste, then at her father’s castle, then again atthe river.So he’d give his life for her but not his love toher?It was a depressing thought and one that, along with her aching body, exhaustedher. She had no idea what to do besides try not to allow herself to be hurt toomuch by him. The best way she knew to do that was to keep herself away fromhim, emotionally and physically, as much as possible.
With that thought in her head, shebraced herself for the cold, and shifted slightly forward. But within moments,her teeth were chattering. Within an hour, being cold had so exhausted her thatshe could no longer keep her eyes open. She closed them and allowed her body tosway with the cantering of the horse.
Eight
Iain hadn’t realized Marion had fallen asleep untilshe suddenly slumped forward. He caught her and gently leaned her against hischest. With her head resting against him, he tightened his hold around herwaist, feeling each deep breath she took.
He could not resist pressing hislips to her head and inhaling her fragrant scent. She stirred in her sleep, andwiggled her bottom, immediately making him hard. He clenched his teeth.
His need for her had grown witheach hour she rode between his thighs. Why had he made that foolish offer notto bed her tonight? Sometimes the best thing for sore muscles was to use themagain. He immediately shoved the greedy thought away. He suspected that ideadid not hold true for the soreness of losing one’s innocence. As he held herclose, her fragrant flowery smell surrounding him, her soft body languid in hisarms, and her silky hair blowing against his face, that same fierce need tokeep her from any harm rose in him.
