Page 44 of Dear Roomie
“Hey, Morgan. I’m really glad you’re here.” She bites on her lower lip and glances down at the ground to hide her blush, but she doesn’t let go of my arm.
“Oh…I…hi.” My hand makes a pass through my hair as I stumble over my words. “It’s good to be here. It’s been fun.”
“That’s good. Fun is good. I’m also having fun…” She lets out a nervous chuckle and looks up at me from under her eyelashes. “I-I was wondering if you would maybe like to dance with me,” she asks, the words coming out in one long nervous stream. Her hand trails along my arm, and the sharp edges of her nails dig into my skin, causing it to crawl with goose bumps. I have to fight the impulse to jerk my arm out of her grasp.
This is flirting, right? How do I deal with flirting?
“I…uh…sure,” I agree, and the look of pure joy that overtakes her face is like a punch to the gut. Everything about this feels wrong, but I don’t know why. Putting my reservations behind me, I let her lead me out toward our friends and dance.
She moves with that same fluid grace that she displayed the first time I saw her at Cutter’s. It’s a stark contrast to the normal timidness I expect from her. She seems like a whole new person when she dances, and I’ve got to admit that confidence looks good on her. My own movements are stiff and clumsy in comparison. I try my best to keep up, but it’s clear I’m way out of my element here. She doesn’t seem put off by my lack of skill, though. She is all smiles as she guides me through it.
Racking my brain, I try to remember anything I could use to start a conversation, but nothing comes. I know we’ve talked before, but my brain is short-circuiting. Between James’s behavior, Evelyn’s advances, and trying not to make a fool of myself by tripping over my feet, there isn’t any room left for meto remember how to make small talk. Thankfully, she doesn’t let me flounder for too long.
“I’ve noticed you haven’t been coming out with Nathan much lately.”
It really isn’t much to go on, but I’ll take what she gives me.
“It’s hard to find time to go bar hopping with my classes. Plus, that’s not really my scene.”
“That’s a shame. I’ve missed having you around.” She wraps both her hands around my neck and pulls her body flush against mine. My hand grabs her waist on instinct, and she beams up at me. “Maybe we could find something to do together that’s more your scene, then.” She all but whispers the words in my ear as she grinds against me.
Did she just ask me out?
I stumble over her feet, and she pulls back, ungluing herself from me. It gives me a second to think over her offer. She’s cute, and she’s a nice girl, but there’s something missing.
She isn’t James.
I don’t know where the thought comes from, but it sinks its barbed claws into me and refuses to let go. The sharp realization makes everything crystal clear, and disgust coils deep in my gut, not at her but at myself. I wrench myself away from her hold. Indulging her attention feels like the coward’s way out, like I’m stringing her along. It’s not like James will ever be mine, but it’s unfair to Evelyn to entertain the idea of dating while I’m pining after someone else.
“I don’t know if that’s a great idea,” I tell her, then grimace at the look of disappointment that flashes across her face.
Her focus shifts to something over my shoulder. I turn to follow her gaze and find my roommate watching us with cutting focus. The remnants of melancholy still seem to hover around her, but she’s standing taller, more sure of herself, more like the James I know. If looks could kill, my she-devil would have murdered us where we stand. Evelyn looks between us both for several seconds before she comes to the same realization I had just a moment before.
“Oh, I see,” she says, stepping back to make the space between us even larger.
“Evelyn, I’m sorry. It’s not—”
“No, it’s fine. I totally get it,” she interrupts.
“There is nothing to get. She’s with Tanner, and—”
Evelyn lets out a bitter laugh. “She deserves better than Tanner. Did you know he stood her up today?”
“He did what?” My tone is sharper than intended, but I can’t contain the spark of rage that her words ignite. That explains why James currently looks like a hollow version of herself.
“He was supposed to meet us at the hotel hours ago but hasn’t shown.” Her face scrunches up for a second, as if just thinking about the man puts a bad taste in her mouth. She shakes it off and gives me a nudge in James’s direction. I start to reply, but she cuts me off with a shake of her head. “Go talk to her.”
I give her a small nod and make my way over to James. Wariness shines in her expression as she tracks my approach; she’s like a rabbit caught in a predator’s sights, readying itself to flee at a moment’s notice. Disappointment pangs in my chest. One of these days, she will learn that I’m not her predator, and that she could never be anyone’s prey. Until that day comes, I’ll keep doing what I can to reassure her there’s no wolf waiting to strike underneath this wool.
“Ariel, Belle, and…” I pause to try to figure out what exactly she is supposed to be. My gaze roams over her white dress and coiffed blond locks. “…Marilyn Monroe? That is an interesting combo.”
She huffs and turns her attention to the ocean.
“Hey, I’m sorry. I was only joking around. You look beautiful, James.” My words tumble out in a rush. Two sentences in, and I’m already messing this up. I want to cheer her up, not make things worse.
“No, it’s fine.” She lets out a long sigh but turns back to face me. “It’s just…I’m only…It wasn’t…” She stumbles over her words, never finishing a thought.
“It was Tanner’s idea, right?” I supply, and her eyes narrow as her shoulders fall.
