Page 43 of Coming Home
Pulling up outside the house they all bundled out and while her sisters fussed and asked if she was okay, Rosina assured them she was fine, overtired from work, a bit under the weather and hadn’t been sleeping, that’s why she’d lost it a bit when they went to see Granny Sylvia. They seemed to believe her and as she sucked in a deep breath, she congratulated herself on being the most deceitful sister and daughter anyone would not wish for. She was getting so good at winging it, buying time, kidding herself and because of all of these, Rosina felt nothing but shame.
Leonora
Leonora lingered in the hallway that was like a sensory time bomb, combining all the elements of Christmas that she had come to expect from their family home. First of all, it smelt divine as she inhaled the scent of cinnamon and pine and next, there was a festive treat for the eyes courtesy of the tree decorated with half a garden centre and handmade heirlooms from when they were children. Ears next, and they hung their coats on the stand to the strains of a familiar song on one of the CDs her mum refused to throw out, even though it was scratched and only played half of ‘The Little Drummer Boy’ before skipping to ‘A Space Man Came Travelling’. Leonora knew the running order of bothNow It’s ChristmasCDs.
While Rosina nipped to the loo, no doubt to sort out her face, Leonora surreptitiously checked her phone and grimaced when she saw the missed calls and texts from Caspar. Jeez, that man really would not take no for an answer. She’d scraped through Saturday without him bugging her mum, begging her to intervene and speak to her ‘recalcitrant’ youngest daughter. That was the actual word he’d used in a text to Leonora. She’d had to look it up, confirming again that he was an utterly condescending pillock. Fingers crossed, she could stall him a bit longer and if he dared turn up there, he’d be the sorriest man in Cheshire.
The first thing she did when she got back to her car that Friday afternoon was delete his photo from the contacts on her phone and now he was just a name, no smarmy face popping up and that in itself was so liberating. Then, she drove to Joel’s brother’s house, stopping at the first supermarket she came to where she bought enough ingredients to feed the street. She had that Friday feeling. It was the first Friday where she and Joel could spend the whole evening together and wake up in the same bed and she did not feel one ounce of guilt.
The next thing on her list was to change her phone number or block Caspar completely. She’d already done that on Facebook and Instagram. But first she wanted to tell her mum about their break-up in private which was scheduled for later that night, once they had the girls-only lunch and the Chinese banquet or whatever the kids decided on. She had planned to mention it to her sisters on the way back from the churchyard, knowing they’d keep shtum, but Rosina’s meltdown had taken precedence and now it was her mum’s time.
Leonora was actually very curious about what her mum wanted to tell them but then again, it was probably something really boring, and bound to be to do with the garden centre. Violetta was already in the kitchen when she arrived to what could only be described as a top-class spread that Leonora would have been proud of herself. ‘Mum, this looks fab… I think you’ve excelled yourself this time.’
Pulling out her chair she took a seat at the table and shouted to her sister, ‘Rosie, hurry up or I’ll eat all the salmon sandwiches.’
Coming over to the table, her mum kissed the top of Leonora’s head and whispered, ‘Violetta has just explained about Rosina so don’t worry, I’ll keep my eye on her for the rest of the week.’
Hearing footsteps in the corridor as Rosina appeared in the doorway, Carmen clapped her hands. ‘And here she is at last, no show without Punch. Right, sit down and let’s get this party started. Violetta, you can do the honours with the champagne. I thought I’d treat us and then once we’ve eaten, I’ll tell you my news.’
The sound of Rosina pulling out her chair was joined by the pop of a cork and as glasses were filled, Leonora took a moment to glance around the table.
Violetta was sipping her drink, trying not to giggle at her mum’s detailed description of every single sandwich filling and every single cake. Rosina fiddled with her napkin and looked miles away but at least she’d stopped crying and their mother, the great and wonderful Carmen was in her element, loving having her biggest chicks gathered around.
Allowing herself a quick thought of Joel, she enjoyed the tickle of excitement that flickered in her chest, and now she’d dealt with Caspar, she also enjoyed being the sister with a big secret. She had a right old tale to tell about her rekindled affair with Joel – but only when the time was right. They’d all be so surprised, she knew that, shocked she’d kept something important to herself because they’d always shared so much. It was usually Vi who dropped teatime bombshells and Rosina never put a foot wrong so today, she would be centre stage with her news. The tapping of a spoon on pine drew her back to what was going on around the table where her mum was making a little toast, to daughters, sisters, family and the future.
21
Carmen
There was definitely something wrong with Rosina. After polishing off the champagne, Violetta was knocking back the white wine like her life depended on it, and as for Leonora, for want of a better word she looked slightly smug. It was all very odd and not how Carmen had envisaged her special lunch because she’d spent most of it watching her daughters like hawks. Did they really think she wouldn’t notice the signs?
Violetta was staying over, a sure sign she intended to get merry… or was she drowning her sorrows? That was understandable. After all, her business was about to fold but there was something else. She seemed edgy and hadn’t stopped checking her phone that never stopped bloody buzzing.
And yes, Leonora had that dreamy look of a teenager which made her suspect she and Caspar had made up after their little tiff, or whatever it was on Friday. Her suspicious mind was on red alert and she wondered if Caspar’s flap had something to do with, dare she even think it, grandchild number six? If that was the case it would put the mockers on a big wedding, unless they intended to do it quickly or postpone again, which wouldn’t be a problem. She decided once she’d told the girls her first bit of news she’d drop the hint about getting back to planning the wedding. The Bern thing was more of an encore and could wait.
It was Rosina who was really bothering Carmen. She was behaving like she did at her gran’s wake, miles away. Lost in thought then being dragged into the present to exchange pleasantries but within moments she was gone again, eyes misted over, detached from everyone in the room. It could be visiting the churchyard that had brought back memories and from what Violetta had hurriedly explained, it sounded like work was getting on top of her. The only thing she couldn’t fathom was why Rosina hadn’t said something.
Carmen had always been there to lend a hand. Looking after a home with four kids in it was a challenge, especially when the twins arrived. Nevertheless, with a bit of help here and there Rosina had got through teething, toddler tantrums and teenage strops. Now they were older, the grandkids looked after themselves more and more and as for work, Rosina could run the garden centre with her eyes shut. So why was she so stressed? This was another conundrum she intended to solve by the end of the day but first, maybe she could distract all three of them with her announcement.
Petra was seated on her lap, snout resting on the table, transfixed by a lone egg and cress triangle that had her name on it. Tapping the table to bring order, Carmen got down to it.
‘Right, I think it’s time I told you my bit of news. Well, it’s an idea really and I wanted your thoughts on it.’
Violetta piped up first. ‘I knew it. You’re going to start a reindeer farm, seeing as you’ve gone Christmas bonkers! Will you do sledge rides? Ooh, we could get huskies and a giant snow machine.’
Leonora tapped her sister’s arm. ‘Stop being sarky, Vi. Go on Mum, what is it?’
Taking a breath, Carmen told them her plan. ‘I want to track down my dad.’
All three sisters gasped and before they could bombard her with questions she held up her hand, signalling they should wait. ‘I always respected Mum’s wishes and feelings, knowing how much it would hurt her if I searched for him and brought him back into our lives. He was a taboo subject, you know that, but for the past few years I’ve had a sense of time running out. He’d be in his seventies now, seventy-six to be precise, that’s if he’s still alive so now Mum isn’t here and I can’t upset her, I think it’s the right time to try and find him.’
Violetta spoke first. ‘I think it’s a brilliant idea, Mum, so go for it. And I’m sure Gran would want you to do this. Maybe she even suspected you would once she was gone. Did she ever say anything to you? You know, give you her blessing?’
‘No, nothing. Not directly, apart from what she said the last time we spoke but I don’t want to talk about that today, it’s too painful. I’d rather focus on the future.’
‘We understand, don’t we?’ Leonora looked around the table and received nods from her sisters. ‘So, where are you going to start?’
‘I’m going to use a special agency that deals specifically with this kind of thing. I’ve already been in touch and I’m going to send them his details in the new year, not that I have much to go on, really. Only the two photos and a marriage certificate. Mum must have taken it so she could apply for a divorce but she never got round to it. I’m hoping there weren’t too many George Samuel Wilsons who were born in South Shields in 1945. He could be anywhere now though. As you know, he was in the merchant navy and I always imagined that when Mum left him, he’d have gone back to sea so he might have settled abroad for all I know.’
