Page 144 of Girl Between
She stopped swaying and stared into his eyes. “Tell me your decision to leave the FBI has nothing to do with me leaving D.C.”
“I can’t.”
She looked up at him, sadness clouding her gaze. “Jake …”
“It’s not like that,” he assured her. “I’ve been thinking about it fora while now. It’s always been in the back of my mind, growing a little stronger every time my hands were tied by red tape or bureaucratic bullshit. And our last few cases …” He trailed off, knowing if anyone understood the nightmare Jake saw every time he shut his eyes, it was Dana. She’d lived it right alongside him.
“You were dragged into those cases because of me,” she replied.
“And here I thought I was the one who did the dragging. I’m the FBI agent, remember?”
“Yes, but it was my field of expertise that brought the demons out of the darkness and into your life.”
“Our life,” Jake clarified. Dana tensed in his arms, but she didn’t pull away. She continued staring at him, those big brown eyes of hers inviting him in. “There will always be monsters in this world, Dana.”
“I know that. And I feel a whole lot better knowing good guys like you are there to stop them.” Her gaze was pleading. “Don’t leave the FBI, Jake. The world needs more people like you.”
“I know, but I can’t help thinking I can do more without the bureau.”
“How do you mean?”
Jake didn’t know why he shied away from just telling Dana everything. Maybe it was because saying it to her meant admitting he wanted it. And that was something he tried not to let himself do. To want things … to hope and dream. That’s what made men vulnerable. And that was something he refused to be.
Stroking a loose tendril of hair from her cheek, he implored her to understand. “Dana, I see you in New Orleans, and you’re thriving.”
She started to shake her head. “Jake?—”
“Hear me out,” he interrupted. “I know why you left D.C. But seeing that you can fit here, that you can find a place to do what you do best somewhere new, it gives me hope that I can branch out, too.”
“But where?”
“I’m not sure yet. If this works, the beauty of it is I won’t have to settle for just one place. The bureau’s new director made it clear I’m out, but Jenks still has some reach.” He paused, knowing there was no going back if he said it, but he realized he didn’t care.
He didn’t want to go back. Whether Dana did or not, D.C. didn’t have its claws in him anymore.
“I’m going out on my own. I’ve talked to my contacts already and laid the groundwork. The private sector will allow me the flexibility to choose my own cases, do more without pressure from the Hill weighing in on every decision.” Jake swallowed. “What do you think?”
Dana’s brown eyes were wide with …Shock? Disappointment?
“It’s stupid, I know,” said Jake.
But Dana wouldn’t let him take it back. “No,” she said, pulling him closer. “It’s perfect. I feel foolish for not thinking of it sooner.”
“Really?”
“Really. I think it’s perfect, Jake. It’ll give you the flexibility to spend more time with your family, too.”
“Yeah, that’s been a heavy factor in my decision.”
“So, you’ve already decided?”
“Well, this is the first time I’ve said it out loud, but … yeah. It feels right.”
She beamed at him in that way that made his chest tight. “Tell me the name?”
“What?”
“Oh, come on! If you thought it through this far, you have a name. What is it?”
