Page 5 of Handling Skylar
I could almost hear her teeth grinding. Good thing there was a competent dentist in this town. I calmly ate my oh-so-delicious pie. I was certain that Anna Kate would be eating crow. There was one thing about cowgirls who owned their own businesses. It took gumption and hard work. Texas my ass. I came from strong Wyoming stock with backbone to spare. Anna Kate had no idea what she was up against.
“You’ve got her on the run already?” River said in my ear. We entwined pinkies in a sign of solidarity. “I so don’t want that woman in our family.”
We released our fingers, and Braxton gave me an atta-girl look, Boone smiled with a conspiratorial wink, and Booker inclined his head. Talk about some powerful wagons circling around me.
How could I go wrong when I had all the Outlaws on my side?
Chapter 2
JAKE
Keeping the peace seemed to be my lot in life. With Chase, with my family, with Anna Kate. I needed her, and she knew it. Needed the respectability that came with her name and influence in Suttontowne. I had a plan, and she was knowingly a part of it. Everyone had to make sacrifices to get what they wanted. She was the cornerstone of rebuilding our reputation. It was the perfect match, she and I. Why then didn’t I feel good about it anymore?
Experiencing a sudden sharpening of awareness, I glanced over at Skylar while my brother moved up to the podium. She met my eyes and winked. She was like sunshine on a cloudy day, unperturbed as she ate a second piece of pie. I smiled all of a sudden thinking Anna Kate wouldn’t be caught dead eating even one. I didn’t believe carbs were on her list.
Sky’s face in profile was just as compelling as it was head-on. That sugar was potent with all that dark hair and those striking hazel eyes, more green than brown. With the hat pulled low, shadowing her face, but accentuating her strong, stubborn jawline, I wondered how all that dark hair would feel running through my fingers.
She wasn’t as refined as Anna Kate, her features were strong and sharp where Anna Kate’s were delicate and polished, but she had something strong and true in that face. She was just beautiful as she was.
And, her body. What red-blooded male could not admire all those voluptuous curves that filled out her shirts and her shorts in the most tantalizing way? A sharp contrast to Anna Kate’s rail-thin figure. There was something easy and wholesome about her from the top of her head beneath the cowboy hat she wore to the tips of her scuffed boots. I bet she knew how to ride and maybe even rope. Her cowgirl look was both chic and simple with a grace and elegance all her own. But it wasn’t the grace and elegance that intrigued me, it was the sensuality in her as she brought the fork to that soft-looking mouth with those beautiful, clever hands that made her a living.
Every time I looked at her, I got caught in a strange restlessness, like an itch I couldn’t scratch but plagued me. I looked down and caught sight of my shiny loafers, a definite contrast to those well-worn boots. We were from different worlds, and the necessity of maintaining the status quo dictated my life right now. There was no percentage in thinking these thoughts about a woman I had no business looking at, let alone wanting.
The microphone sent out that high-pitched sound as Chase knocked against it when he stepped up to the podium, and my attention turned to him. My gut churned immediately whenever I was in his presence. I had been back to Suttontowne for two years, and I still hadn’t seen my brother’s place or sought him out. There was this…barrier of anger and resentment in me that I couldn’t seem to shake where he was concerned. We had been so close, and he had just up and left when we weren’t home. We’d sat at his graduation ceremony until we realized he wasn’t there. Then we started to worry and get really scared something had happened to him.
Discounting the pain of his betrayal, I swallowed down my anger where it sat like a granite block. Anger was always easier. He’d abandoned us. Just like that. High-tailed it to the bayou and left us all behind. He’d known what the Colonel was back then and had carried that away with him, letting us go along as if this big dark secret hadn’t shadowed us all.
As usual, it was up to me to pick up the pieces and put it all back together again. I was the one who’d stayed and followed the path that had been laid out for us. River had gone off to New York City and her modeling career, Momma thrilled with her choice of profession.
I’d gone off to Harvard, studied hard and come home with a degree. Even gotten my masters in plant pathology from Louisiana State University about forty-five minutes away in Baton Rouge. I was contemplating getting my Ph.D. in crop physiology as well, not sure about the time commitment. I’d already done plenty of research, and unknown to my daddy, four years ago I had been experimenting with grafting different varieties of trees to get sweeter, disease resistant, early maturing nuts. They were ripening for harvest and would be ready toward the end of October.
Why did I think my daddy would recognize me as an equal instead of his son who still was wet behind the ears? I had so many ideas, was going forward with them behind his back as once they came to fruition, he would see I was serious about building and expanding our business. I couldn’t help wondering if I was still standing in my brother’s shadow.
“Hello, everyone,” my brother said, his voice subdued. I really didn’t want to be here today, I thought, with anger rising. If Momma hadn’t given me those sad, moist eyes and talked with that catch in her voice, I wouldn’t be. She and my sister were my Achilles heel all right.
“I’ve been tasked with speaking to you all today. It seems that razing the Colonel’s statue went over big with everyone. I have to say it’s about time we changed our focus from one family influencing this town when all of us have made our contributions to the success of Suttontowne.”
There was applause and smiles in the crowd and I had to grudgingly give Chase his due for voicing exactly what I was feeling. I wasn’t ready to forgive, but already I was starting to squirm inside. Hearing my brother’s words were much more powerful than just thinking them myself. I wanted the Suttons to be judged on their own merits, not some dusty, dried up old bones that made a terrible error in judgment hundreds of years ago. Rebuilding the family’s reputation was what needed to be done.
When the revelry died down, Chase shifted and his gaze met mine, strong and direct, then moved onto Momma and Daddy, then over to River and her family. He smiled. “Sometimes journeys take a long time to complete. I was on my own journey. Discovering new paths and new ways of thinking were hard and took a toll on me and my family.” He paused and his hands gripped each side of the podium. His gaze fell on Samantha and softened. “Most people are scared of change. They are set in their ways and like things the way they are. Why rattle the cage? Change causes fear because change takes us out of our comfort zone.” His eyes lingered on her and it was clear that Samantha had played a huge part in my brother’s transformation from bayou recluse to speaking in front of the town.
“I was the ‘black sheep.’ Everyone knows what happened back when I left for the bayou after high school, but only now do you know that I struggled with my family background just as the Outlaws must have struggled with theirs before they knew the truth.”
That was one thing I couldn’t be sorry about. The Outlaws vindicated. That gave me deep satisfaction. I never went for that whole hate-them-because-their-ancestor-was-a-bad-guy thing. Braxton and I were secretly friends when we were kids and now we could be friends out in the open.
My brother paused again, and I was struck with the memory of him all through my life. He was always so confident, so sure about what he wanted to do. We had the kind of life everyone dreamed of—cars, money, prestige, but my brother had never been caught up in all that. I, on the other hand, loved all my toys, enjoyed my lifestyle and was unapologetic about it. There was nothing wrong with enjoying material things. It was all about perspective.
I’d sell everything, lose everything if it meant that my family would be judged not by the past, but what we were today.
“My family has gone through change. Change I thought would never happen. That feeling of toxicity is no longer part of my thought process. I’ve made my amends, and we’ve come to a mutual understanding. So why am I telling you all about this today? Because it’s key that you have people in your life who love you unconditionally—meaning you accept the good and the bad. It doesn’t really matter if they are related by blood or not. What matters is the commitment. As with all relationships, there will be ups and downs and, perhaps, periods of upheaval when one person is doing some self-exploration.” His gaze rested on me again. “Yet sometimes you do part ways as you take different paths in your life, and that’s okay too.”
Those words wrenched me, and I unfolded my arms and sat up straighter. Our relationship had many landmines, and Chase just set off one in me. It was an explosion that blasted through me breaking down the wall that kept my pain at bay, and it all flooded into me with the power of his words.
His gaze held mine. “Whether you create your own family unit or use one you have, it is vital to your well-being that you have these close relationships in your life. Sometimes you distance yourself from people you love by self-sabotaging…hell knows I have done that plenty. You keep them at arm’s length, just close enough to interact on a daily basis, but not close enough to be truly intimate with them on an emotional level. There is no end to how deeply you can connect with those with whom you wish to love. The layers are endless.”
I rose, my fists clenched. I had challenged him to make this speech, and he had made it about us. Everything he was saying only made the rage in me burn hotter. It was him who had left. Him who had broken our relationship. Him who had abandoned me when I needed him. When I felt lost. He was my brother and I couldn’t seem to shake this sense of abandonment.
Forgiveness was completely beyond me.
