Page 9 of Buon Natale, My Wicked Rogue
“That must have been hard,” Lady Wyndam said. “Not being accepted by the ladies in your social circle and not having children to care for.”
“It was. I often felt so useless, so unwanted. If not for my husband’s father, I don’t know what I would have done.”
“He accepted you?”
“Yes, he did. He alone was delighted with Jacob’s choice of me. The senior Mr. Berry, or Papa as I came to call him, said that I had the intelligence of a man and the intuition and understanding of a woman.” She blushed. “I suppose that sounds a little like a criticism of women rather than a compliment, but he was, after all, a man. This is how they think of women. Believe me, I know how fortunate I am that my father allowed me the funds for an excellent education, and I wish all girls could have that advantage.”
“Yes indeed, you’ve been most fortunate in your education, and it put you at an advantage with your father-in-law.”
Angela nodded. “When Jacob grew bored with me and basically put me aside, his father took me in and trained me to handle the account books and manage the warehouses. Jacob had never shown a lasting interest in managing the family business. He just refused to settle down and take his role in the business seriously.
“His father said that he could rest in peace when he went home to the Lord because he knew I would be there to watch over the business.” She grew sad. “After a prolonged illness, he passed away last year, and since then, his brother has taken over the business. Jacob died in an accident while illness incapacitated his father. I don’t think Papa Berry ever thought that his son would die before he did. And he was always certainthat Jacob would sire an heir by me. Papa Berry was ever an optimist.”
Lady Wyndam leaned forward, her eyes lighting merrily. “So, for the first time in your life as a woman, you are free of responsibility? You are free of ties.”
“Yes,” Angela said sadly.
“Yet, instead of feeling relieved, you feel useless, as though your vitality is gone, though you are still a young woman?”
“Yes, exactly.”
“But, Mrs. Berry, you are also free to indulge your whims. You are free to enjoy whatever adventure and entertainment you may find.” Lady Wyndam’s brown eyes shone so compassionately. “But you are afraid to reach out for fear of some consequences.”
“Perhaps you are correct.” She thought of the excitement that had surged through her veins when she and Susan had embarked on their plan to sneak into the masquerade. She had allowed the attack to make a coward of her.
“The Earl of Ashington was certainly taken with you.”
Such a handsome gentleman, never mind his cockiness. She would dance with him now if given a second chance. What a pity the masquerade was over. What a shame that she’d allowed such a chance for romance, passion and adventure to slide past her. She would be headed home soon. Lady Wyndam said that Susan had already gone home the night before.
Regret put heaviness into her chest, and she let her shoulders sag a bit. She wasn’t as brave as she had imagined.
“You are an evasive one, to be sure.” Lady Wyndam’s eyes narrowed as she studied her with such exaggerated obviousness that Angela felt her cheeks heat.
“Ah ha! I knew you were still thinking of Evan.” Lady Wyndam’s brown eyes twinkled again. Her grin eased Angela’s sore heart, and she felt an answering lift tugging at the corners of her own mouth.
“He is an extraordinarily handsome gentleman.” She fanned her face with her hand to cool her increasingly hot cheeks. “I’ll grant you that.”
“Then what is the problem?”
Angela scoffed. “Oh, he’s too sure of himself by far.”
“And you’re just the one to put him in his place. It will be good for him. He’s had life too soft for too long. Every man needs some challenge.”
“Goodness.” She didn’t know what else to say.
“Don’t you want to go and prepare yourself?” Lady Wyndam said.
“Prepare myself for what?”
“Don’t you remember? He asked to come and visit today.”
Gooseflesh spread up her neck and over her scalp, a pleasurable shiver.
Well, he is an extraordinarily handsome gentleman.
And perhaps he did need someone to challenge his cockiness.
She had longed for adventure. And if she were honest, yes, that included carnal adventure. But wasn’t that what she had expected to find with Jacob?
