Page 63 of Hupotasso
“My side?” I grip her arm before she can walk away. “Mother said she had help from within the royal house to put Angelina in The Games. Is buying off the selectors being onmy side, Attracta? Because last time I looked my mother was on a life support system as a result of this so-called help.”
She raises her chin and pulls her arm out of my grip.
“And what would have been the result had she not interfered?” She hisses. “Have you thought of thatLordDragonspur? Did it occur to you that your mother and I might have been privy to machinations that were at play and worked to try and mitigate that? Has it occurred to you, at all, that perhaps while you took your eye off the ball and wallowed in self-pity she, one who loves you above everyone else, was busy behind the scenes trying to save your life and your title?”
“I need no help in that regard,” I snarl.
“Indeed?” She snorts. “Yet here you are snivelling outside the Queen’s chambers while those whowouldaid you are reviled. You don’t deserve your mother’s love.”
As she storms off I find a seat and wait for my audience with the queen.
And wait.
Feeling like a naughty schoolboy or a peasant seeking a meeting with his master, I mull over Attracta’s words. Few would dare speak to me as she had. Angelina does, but otherwise I’ve rarely been so chastised, and it gives me pause.
She’s right. I don’t deserve my mother’s love.
I don’t deserve any woman’s love.
When the Queen’s man informs me the monarch has decided she won’t meet with me after all, I’m not even surprised.
47
I smile as he holds the chocolate-covered spoon to my mouth and I taste the sauce for his latest dessert.
For weeks now we’ve been cooking together and sleeping together, but only the former feels right.
Viper isn’t here, but his grip on me hasn’t lessened. Every night since the attack on Eleanor I’ve rested in Jag’s arms, whispering sweet lies, receiving his warmth and comfort, enjoying his company.
And every day I cry alone, wondering how the hell I’m ever going to get out of this mess, and when this whole house of cards is going to come tumbling down.
If I’d never met Falcon I could easily have seen myself falling for Jag. I know he has a vicious streak and that torture and tracking are his special skills. But for a vampire he’s remarkably well-adjusted, and everything his friend isn’t, with his easy laughter and gentle lovemaking. But Ihadmet Falcon, and despite everything that has gone on between us, nothing,nobody,compares. I’d take his spanking and passionate sex on the floor any day over Jag’s whispered endearments and tender hands.
At least what I had with Falcon was real.
“Penny for your thoughts,” Jag says now as he continues stirring his dessert.
“She’s probably wondering why somebody hasn’t staked you yet,” Asumpta grunts from the table where she’s cleaning her blades. “Or why you haven’t become the fattest vampire on the planet.”
Jag laughs, and I shake my head.
I hadn’t managed to catch her alone yet to thank her for clearing my name about Tatyana, even if I could get the words out, or to question her more about the castle and its residents. But when she wasn’t ‘procuring’ she was often in the kitchen when Jag and I cooked. I think she’d have to be blind not to see something was going on, and she’s always struck me as someone who paid careful attention to detail.
“Where is your husband?” She asks now, catching my eye as though she’d read my thoughts.
“He’s in Russia,” Jag answers for me, “tying up some loose ends.”
“Strange you didn’t accompany him,” she snorts. “I thought you two were attached at the hip.”
“Wolf’s with him. They’ll be back tomorrow. In the meantime, I’m here to protect Angelina from any further attacks by Spider,” Jag shrugs.
“Ah, is that what you call it,” she smirks. “Protection.”
I catch Jag’s eye, and he frowns.
‘I think she knows.’
I wonder why she hasn’t said anything before, but then she’s made it clear she hates all of Falcon’s family, so perhaps she’s happy that what’s going on between Jag and I will cause a major upset if it’s discovered.
