Page 22 of Savage Ruin
I run a hand down my face to clear my expression before I turn to Mateo. “Not exactly. She’s having nightmares. Since I’m the closest, I’ve been helping her get through them.”
Mateo raises an eyebrow and gives me a smug look that makes me want to wipe it off with my fist, but he’s not wrong, damn it.
Grayson straightens from his lounging position against the wall. “Care to tell us how you’re helping her get through the nightmares?” Dark blue eyes flare with anger.
“Sometimes we talk, watch a movie, or I stay until she goes to sleep,” I say with a shrug, as if it’s not a big deal. Walking over to the punching bag, I push it a few times to expel some of the energy burning inside me. “I understand what it’s like to need someone to help you get through the dark nights.” I turn back to Grayson. “Don’t you?”
He narrows his eyes. “You’re sleeping in her bed, aren’t you?” He scoffs. “No wonder she’s confused.”
I clench my fists tightly and remind myself of the reasons why I don’t want to punch Grayson. He’s family. You protect your family. Marcos drilled that into me at an early age because he knew if my father ever caught up to us, either he or I would have to get the family to a safe place. But he’s also right. I growl in frustration.
“You’re right. I fucked up, too. Maybe we’ve all fucked up. Henley isn’t innocent, but she’s not a sophisticated woman of the world, either. I agree with Mateo. From now on, let her make the moves. If she wants you two, it’s up to her to decide,” I say resignedly. “As for me, I won’t stop helping her at night, but I’ll stop sleeping in her bed. I’ll make it clear any attraction isn’t reciprocated. Deal?”
Grayson snorts. “Good luck with that.” He turns to Mateo. “I’m not sure I want this with her. It’s too much. She triggers something inside me, but I can’t be anything… good for her. I just don’t know, Mateo.”
Mateo whirls on Grayson. “This is the first time you’ve felt anything in years. Are you going to hide forever because of Kira? She wasn’t well, Grayson. You didn’t drive her to do it. You know the investigator said she’d been mentally unwell her entire life.” He points a finger at him. “And honestly, Henley is a hell of a lot stronger than Kira. Look at all she’s gone through and come out the other side. You’re running scared. You know it. I know it. If you don’t want anything to do with her, be honest.”
Turning to me, he gives me a hard stare. “The same goes for you. Be honest with her, if you can. Honestly, I think you’re both fooling yourselves, but it isn’t the first time I’ve been smarter than you two.” With a last disgusted look at both of us, he stomps out the door.
A smile curves across my lips. I’m impressed. “Did someone switch bodies with Mateo the last few days? Or is this all Henley’s doing?”
Grayson’s staring at the floor. “I think some of it is her. Some of it is him realizing life is a bit more complicated than he thought and he can’t hide behind the numbers forever.” He walks slowly around the room, sliding his finger along the equipment. “Do you think Mateo’s right? Is Henley stronger than Kira?”
He keeps his eyes averted, not wanting me to see the darkness crawling through him, but I hear it in his voice. The thoughts that torture him the most. “She’s stronger. Against all the odds, she kept going. She’s a fighter.” It’s what I admire about her the most, but I don’t admit it to him.
Straightening his shoulders, he stands and meets my eyes. “It takes one to know one, I guess. Thanks, Thiago.”
“Look at the path in front of you, Grayson, not the one in the rearview mirror,” I remind him.
He nods and leaves the gym.
Stripping down to my workout gear, I pick up the wrap on the bench and methodically weave it around my wrists, through my fingers, across my knuckles, and back to my wrists. I do the same to the second hand, then pull on my gloves. Punching hard on the bag, I block out the words reverberating through my head and concentrate on laying it all out on the bag.
* * *
I setthe iPad on her bed with a note on how to access my movie library. Mateo’s right. I can’t keep sleeping in her bed. Hopefully, this will help her when she wakes from her nightmares.
“What are you doing in here?” Henley asks from the open doorway. “I mean. This is your house…” She gives an exasperated sigh. “Do you need something?”
You. Under me. I hold up the tablet for her to see. “I thought you’d want to help yourself to my movie library.” My stomach clenches when I see the understanding dawn on her face, chased by an expression of hurt.
“I see,” she says stiffly. “Thank you. I appreciate your thoughtfulness. I’ll try to keep the volume down so you can get some sleep.” Her eyes dart around the room but never return to me.
“Good night, Henley,” I reply softly.
She says nothing, only dips her chin in reply.
When her cries come later that night, it’s everything I can do not to go to her. Feeling sick, I shove the covers off and lean over the side of the bed with my head in my hands, trying to ignore the sounds. Just when I can’t stand it anymore, they stop. A few minutes later, I hear a movie start. It should make me feel better that she found her way through it without me, but instead, I feel like shit.
CHAPTER14
HENLEY
The sun is barely rising when I wake. Damn Thiago. Crack of dawn. I’m a night owl not an early bird. I turn over, close my eyes, and start counting back from 4000. 3999. 3998. Did I do something to make him leave? 3997. Was it the kiss? 3996. 3995. 3994. Arrrgghh.
Gritting my teeth, I ignore the pain and use the anger to dress myself this morning. It’s time I started doing things again. Rely on myself. I kind of let them call the shots and take care of me the last few days, but I need to get back to my usual self-sufficiency. If they weren’t here, I’d be doing this alone, anyway.
I groan when I pull up my leggings, carefully gripping the fabric to tug them into place, then straightening the seams because leaving them crooked would drive me crazy. When they’re finally in place, I’m a hot, sweaty mess and in pain. Dropping down to the bed, I give myself a few minutes to rest from the ordeal. Who thought my favorite item of clothing would be so damn hard to get on?
