Page 87 of Her Destined Alpha
“Love you, too,” I replied quietly, a smile crossing my lips, although I tried to suppress it. He held me, caressing my back under my hoodie gently until I had my breath back.
“Mind if I ask you a question?” he asked, slipping his hand out of my pants and placing his fingers into his mouth, his eyes flashing. I nodded as he wrapped both arms around me, his grey eyes looking into mine. “I might be kinda out of line… but… are you a virgin?”
His words made my smile vanish. My heart thundered. Was that a bad thing? Was it that obvious? I never really had time for a relationship... was my inexperience that evident?
“Hey, it-”
“Does it matter?” I asked quietly, tugging free and getting off his lap. “Excuse me, I’m just going to go clean up.”
“Del-”
I slammed the bathroom door shut, my heart thundering as I placed a hand on my chest. Why did I panic? Any near sexual encounters were forced, and I had been able to protect myself from those at least… but…
I slid down the bathroom door, wrapping my arms around my knees, trying to fight the sudden sense of insecurity that rushed over me. Rayhan probably grew up surrounded by beautiful women who owned their sexuality, and there I was. Lost… useless… scarred… inexperienced…
“Kitten?” His voice was soft as he knocked lightly on the door. I scrambled away from the door.
“I’m coming!” I called, turning the tap on.
“Okay.”
I closed my eyes. How was I going to face him?
Rayhan
Shit, I wishI had never asked. The moment her face changed, it scared me. Maybe I was wrong and she wasn’t, but she’d had a messed up life. She obviously didn’t have time to have a relationship. She was gorgeous, and I wasn’t saying that just because she was my mate.
The fear that maybe something worse had happened was eating me up inside, and I was terrified. I didn’t know if she had been sexually abused as she never mentioned it, but her reaction... I was losing my mind as she stayed silent.
Even when she came out of the bathroom, saying we should head out, I wasn’t able to break down the barrier she had built around herself. She changed the topic quickly when I tried to talk to her about it, not even looking at me once. The only reason I had asked was because she felt so damn tight, and I could tell she felt discomfort when I penetrated her with my fingers. Fuck, I’m such an idiot.
I didn’t push too hard as we packed up and prepared to leave. I had rented a car and we were back on the road, heading towards Uncle Al’s pack. She had only talked to me to ask for my phone to view the profiles, screenshotting at least another ten from what I could tell as we drove along.
“Want to stop for food?” I asked. She shook her head, and for a second our eyes met. “I’m sorry for asking that. I didn’t think it through properly,” I said, reaching over for her hand.Please don’t pull away, Kitten.
A wave of relief washed over me as she laced her fingers with mine. She sighed deeply, looking away.
“I’ve not really had the time to live a normal life. I’ve had people try to sexually assault me a few times, but I was able to protect that part of me. But yes, I am a virgin... is that a problem?” she asked quietly, looking out of the window.
I closed my eyes, exhaling quietly. Relief flooded me. She hadn’t been sexually abused, thank the Goddess. She had suffered enough; she didn’t need more added to that. I frowned as her last words registered.
“Problem? Why would it be a problem?” I looked at her, surprised, and heard her heart race as she looked at me.
“We both know you’re definitely experienced… and have probably slept with many amazing women… so, I’m just, like… never mind.” She gave my hand a gentle squeeze, but her heart wasn’t in it as she tugged free and wrapped her arms around her knees, which she tucked up against her chest.
My chest clenched painfully. Fuck… I couldn’t deny that I had slept with other women when I had… but she was the only one who truly mattered. I glanced away from the road. Reaching over, I pulled her head towards me and kissed her forehead softly.
“No other woman has meant anything to me. With them, it was just sex, nothing more. Delsanra, you’re the only one that matters to me, and I’m going to prove that to you,” I said quietly. She sighed and looked up at me. I glanced at the road before looking down at her.
“I know… you’ve proved enough. I’m just… nothing compared to you.” Her words were low. The vulnerability in them fucking hurt.
“You’re wrong; you’re perfect. Perfect for me.” I took her hand, kissing it softly, but that time I didn’t let go, lacing her delicate fingers with mine as I held her hand to my chest.
I was going to make sure she believed that. Someday, she would.
Stopping By
Delsanra
